Have you ever seen something online that was so titillating you felt compelled to try it in real life? Most likely the answer is yes. Online we are offered fantasies of every kind imaginable. And, as young men discovering the world of sex we indulge in the unknown, by curiosity we find all sorts or weird and wonderful things. For me, it was the BBW paraphernalia. I'd always liked slim women when younger and the odd chubby woman. After discovering online material I began to indulge in the odder side of the internet. I found myself aroused by women who were fat. In my mind I insulted them, thinking; you slob, you pig, you have no self control. And this, oddly enough turned me on. So much so that I stopped looking at slim women online and consequently stopped dating skinnier women. Recently I joined a fetish site to indulge in my fantasies. I met a vary large woman - who I need to add was actually a very sweet and intelligent woman. We went on a few dates and then it came to sealing the moment. I stripped all her clothes off and instead of feeing excitement I felt out of place and wrong. Her body wobbled to my touch, her skin was riddled with stretch marks, her movements slowed by her thick set body. The sex was lack lustre with flesh getting in the way of pleasure. Afterwards, I felt disgusted with myself and guilty for not being into it. I also felt awful for the woman and I attempted to play it cool. What I learned: my fetish, which was 'hate fucking' a BBW was only viable online. If you respect the woman and see them as a person then its impossible to 'hate fuck'. I realised my fetish was unhealthy and non-viable for a long term relationship. Recently I've been re-discovering slim women. Truly it is a new world to me, where I'm just exploring what I like and what I don't. I've found, to my surprise, that I turn get aroused by skinny women. I have no clue as to what the future offers me, only that it wont be porn that dictates my likes and dislikes. The End If any of these issues have effected or, if you have any opinions on the matter, then please share below.