Have you ever seen something online that was so titillating you felt compelled to try it in real life? Most likely the answer is yes. Online we are offered fantasies of every kind imaginable. And, as young men discovering the world of sex we indulge in the unknown, by curiosity we find all sorts or weird and wonderful things. For me, it was the BBW paraphernalia. I'd always liked slim women when younger and the odd chubby woman. After discovering online material I began to indulge in the odder side of the internet. I found myself aroused by women who were fat. In my mind I insulted them, thinking; you slob, you pig, you have no self control. And this, oddly enough turned me on. So much so that I stopped looking at slim women online and consequently stopped dating skinnier women. Recently I joined a fetish site to indulge in my fantasies. I met a vary large woman - who I need to add was actually a very sweet and intelligent woman. We went on a few dates and then it came to sealing the moment. I stripped all her clothes off and instead of feeing excitement I felt out of place and wrong. Her body wobbled to my touch, her skin was riddled with stretch marks, her movements slowed by her thick set body. The sex was lack lustre with flesh getting in the way of pleasure. Afterwards, I felt disgusted with myself and guilty for not being into it. I also felt awful for the woman and I attempted to play it cool. What I learned: my fetish, which was 'hate fucking' a BBW was only viable online. If you respect the woman and see them as a person then its impossible to 'hate fuck'. I realised my fetish was unhealthy and non-viable for a long term relationship. Recently I've been re-discovering slim women. Truly it is a new world to me, where I'm just exploring what I like and what I don't. I've found, to my surprise, that I turn get aroused by skinny women. I have no clue as to what the future offers me, only that it wont be porn that dictates my likes and dislikes. The End If any of these issues have effected or, if you have any opinions on the matter, then please share below.
I think many of us have been there. It was like you "hate-fucked" yourself, wasn't it? Indeed, when sexual desire is fueled by negative emotions and it's sole purpose is instant and physical gratification, it leaves us feeling disgusted with ourselves and empty inside. I have had this feeling so many times in the past... the most confusing part was that it was always following an intense orgasm. I will never again rape myself. But I am happy I have experienced it and now I know exactly what I want in my life. I bet this was a useful experience for you. It made you realize something very important about you and the world around you. This is called growing up.
A few people have had a similar experience meeting transexuals in real life...or homosexuals... I haven't read any occasions where people have enjoyed...
I am crazy about transsexuals and I have been interested in sleeping with them since I was 12. However, I have never lived out my fantasy in the real world. That doesn't mean that I have never been tempted to do so. When I was living abroad, in Spain to be exact, I often encountered advertisements for transsexual escorts around the sleezier parts of town. I saved some of their numbers into my phone and was often tempted to call the Tgirls for sexual encounters, but I never went through with it. On one particular occasion I even dialed a number and spoke to a transsexual hooker. The feeling of taboo was so great and I sensed an overwhelming adrenaline rush throughout my whole body. It was like an ecstatic high. I attempted to speak to the hooker. I tried to keep my composure and just say what I had rehearsed. I was trembling with a combination of fear and excitement. I wanted to arrange an erotic encounter, but only a string of incoherent words came out of my mouth. My heart was pounding. The adrenaline was too much. Eventually I took hold of the situation, told her that I had seen one of her advertisements and was interested in having a sexual encounter with her. It was a close call. She told me that she had recently changed locality and was no longer in my city. Afterwards I was so relieved. I was so close to losing my mind and sleeping with a Tgirl prostitute! I don't believe that I would really like sleeping with a pre-op transsexual. I think I would regret it deeply. I would most likely be too disgusted with myself after the experience. Anal penetration has never appealed to me. Never. In fact, I find it disgusting. Many guys who try a shemale prostitute end up disappointed with the experience and disgusted with themselves. I have read about cases. They found that it wasn't like in the porn scenes they had watched before the experience. I find myself attracted to shemales, I even get an untamable instant boner when I encounter one in a public place (in Spain, I came across Tgirls frequently in the street, in stores, etc.), yet I am not interested in butt sex at all. In my case, the very concept of a male born person becoming a beautiful woman via hormones and surgical intervention is very arousing in itself. That is what I find so exciting. However, I cannot garantee that I will never go through with a shemale encounter. It is possible that one night I end up in a shemale brothel during one of my manic episodes. When I become manic I am capable of almost any act of madness. Also my self-destructive feelings, that is, the internalized self-hatred I hold inside me, have the potential to drive me into that world. Sometimes I experience psychotic episodes, fall into suicide ideation and rationalize that if I am going to kill myself I might as well engage in a frenzy of mindless hedonism first. I am currently seeing a psychiatrist. Post-op transsexuals are a completely different story. I would happily sleep with a post-op. In fact, guys who have done so tend to report that the experience was quite positive. I have a certain fascination with transsexuals, I admire their beauty and feel emotionally attracted to them, but I know that I am a heterosexual guy who likes pussy. Therefore, a post-op transsexual girlfriend would be a happy middle ground for me, a sort of tranny light if ya will. I have never wanted to 'hate-fuck' anyone. I only feel love and admiration for transsexuals, no matter how much society dictates hatred and aversion towards them. I can really relate to your rediscovery of slim girls. from time to time, I put away the transsexual porn and go back to teenaged schoolgirls like back in the good old days when I was in high school. A reversion to our original attraction is often refreshing. However, I have found that I am only really interested in normal females when they are of high school age, around 15 to 16 (that is legal in most countries), and then beyond teenagerhood my attraction is increasingly oriented towards transsexual women. I guess most girls are just not as interesting when they are in their mid twenties. The truth is that I miss being a schoolboy and I miss the company of schoolgirls. I am a very nostalgic person and I am stuck in that epoch of my life. If I were a king, my personal concubinate would consist of highschool girls and post-op transsexual women. Am I crazy? I don't think so. I see myself as a regular heterosexual guy with slightly individual tastes.
