We love/hate porn, and the action solution

Discussion in 'Pornography Addiction' started by NewTerritories, Jan 5, 2018.

  1. NewTerritories

    NewTerritories virtual

    1. We watch porn because we love it. We love its sensuous, pleasurable effect on us.

    2. We hate porn. We hate it because we believe that it harms us, and we love life. So we avoid porn--except when we don't.

    3. So there's a conflict within us. Part of us loves it, part of us hates it. There's also an indifferent part. Different parts of us have different strengths for guiding our behaviour. Most of the time, the porn-loving part isn't strong enough to get its way.

    4. Sometimes, the porn-loving part swells in strength. We are 'triggered' and the neural pathways associated with porn and anticipated pleasure get activated. Then, our porn-hating part has less power. We are at higher risk of succumbing to weakness.

    5. This suggests a pathway towards removing porn from our lives completely: strengthen the porn-hating part. So, we deliberately become more educated on the harmful affects of porn. The individual harm of addiction, and also the wider social harms involved in its production and spread through culture. See: Fight the new Drug.

    6. Over time, the porn-loving part becomes stronger as it gets fed, and weaker as it's starved. I don't know that it can ever fade away completely. I think we should accept that it's going to be a part of us until we're dead. Neurotically fretting over its continued existence doesn't help. Perhaps one can benefit from this neurological souvenir of misadventure: it's a reminder of the power of addiction, a warning that our actions and choices have permanent consequences when we mess around with powerful stimuli (and the way things are going, the potential power of addictive substances and stimulations is due to steadily increase. See: Paul Graham on The Acceleration of Addictiveness.)

    7. Rather than unduly obsessing with our porn-hating, we should give more consideration to strengthening the porn-INDIFFERENT part of us. That is, developing ourselves in areas of life that aren't directly connected to porn: being stronger physically, mentally, socially, being more educated, being able to take action in general.

    8. But to become obsessed with 'self-development' is another mistake. Self-reflection is involved, but the point is: action to affect the real, external world. That is what generates success, which incidentally fuels our self-esteem and self-respect, additional aspects of strength which help us resist temptations like porn, and overcome its ill effects.

    9. Helping others understand and overcome porn addiction is a fine real-world goal. If you're reading this and feeling depressed and aimless, maybe give it a try. Move on to more adventurous goals later.

    10. Seriously, move on. Don't get stuck in a loop, posting the same points on this forum forever. (If you WANT to do that, that's fine, as long as the forum moderators aren't cracking down on duplicate content. I'd prefer if they did, but who asked me, eh?)

    See also:
    Alex Kierkegaard: Action is the cure for neurosis
    Kyle Eschenroeder: Meditations on the Wisdom of Action
     
    Last edited: Jan 6, 2018
    Londoner likes this.

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