Hi, first time poster. Spending Xmas on my own this year after my girlfriend of 14 years said she was leaving me. Was shock to the system as I thought we were happy. The reason she gave was we weren't having sex and she didn't feel I desired her. I know the reason for that is because I was using PMO to get off and had no libido. Stupidly I thought we could get by with loving each other in other ways and thought she'd let me know if there was a problem. I guess I also struggled with my partner feeling too familiar because I see her every day... when PMO offers novelty all the time. I realise now I was in denial. I can't blame my partner for leaving me but now I am wide awake to the problem and trying the reboot I want to be free of this and a loving partner again. Never felt so depressed and suicidal. Can't face anyone at the moment. So ashamed. Ended up buying a book 'Reasons to Stay Alive' because I'm so worried about what I might do during the Xmas holidays now my partner are finally apart and breakup/moving out looks imminent. Is there any advice you can give? Does it get better with time?