tough week

Discussion in 'Pornography Addiction' started by High_Achiever, Apr 15, 2012.

  1. High_Achiever

    High_Achiever New Member

    so 2 weeks ago I relapsed and it turned into a binge, lol. I came across an unexpected trigger and bamm. WOW the urge was too strong. But I'm nog I'm being 2 weeks free again and it feels different.

    So f.e. in the beginning of the second week it was really difficult to control the urge to masturbate. Sometimes I ended up masturbating, but I said no and stopped. It reallly became easier to keep saying no! Later I came across a picture and I started clicking and in the middle of it I said to myself "no I don't want this, look how this has ruined my dating life (and life in general) so far". This effect only became stronger and later in the week it became easier and easier to say no. Friday and Saturday I didn't even masturbate at all!!!!

    Actually I went out saturday. This is also a great tool. If you feel an urge to jerk off, go out (or excercise). Meet up with friends. It was a cool night, I got an enormous ammount of eye contact from women and a lot of them flirted with me. To bad I was still feeling a flatline, haha. But I know that once my libido gets back, it should be no problem. For that seems to happen around day 21, that's how it happenned the last time.

    But I'm really happy with this week. It's not easy to control the urge to masturbate or to stop the momment you're starting to click. Another great example of this. Late at night there is always something erotic on tv, I accidently encountered this and off course it triggers an urge. But I said no and the next days I kept in my bed and said "no I won't turn on that tv!". And I didn't!!

    What triggered all of this? I think it was meditation. If I felt a stronge urge to masturbate, I meditated. Sometimes I did that up to three times a day. I also told myself a lot of the reason why I want to quit this and how it has ruined my life. They say that meditation gives a more clear mind, well in combination with a strong why. It can really be a killer.

    Take care and know that you can beat this!
     
  2. lggh

    lggh New Member

    Good for you for keeping your head up. Ever since I failed my long 45-day period, things haven't been the same. It's been much harder to stay away.

    Sorry if it's a dumb question, but when you said that you were still flatlining on Saturday, do you mean you just weren't into the girls you saw or something else?

    By the way, I searched for your blog on reuniting and couldn't find it...
     
  3. High_Achiever

    High_Achiever New Member

    Hey man

    here's my blog: http://www.reuniting.info/blogs/highachiever

    I wouldn't really give up. Keep pushing! I really mean this, personally I think you've already done better than I did. So why would you give up? It's really weird, but you actually have no choice.

    What I meant by flatlining was that I felt lethargic during the week and that I didn't really feel horny when these girls were flirting. But I just have to keep going and keep meditating.
     
  4. lggh

    lggh New Member

    Thanks for the link. I'll read it later. I don't want to give up. It's been hard for me to make it to 7 days ever since the slip, but I'll try again. I'm not comfortable yet to make a journal like you guys, but I'll update my signature every week assuming I can do it...

    Anyway, good luck! I think just going out and putting yourself in social situations is a step forward. Keep us updated.
     

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