Time to heal

Discussion in 'Ages 40+' started by forlorn, Nov 28, 2018.

  1. forlorn

    forlorn Active Member

    Phew, shaky couple of days. I've been avoiding this place and almost slipping back into old habits. Bit ashamed to tell you but I glanced at some content I shouldn't have looked at. Need to remember that this peeking is hurting me. I've come so far, why self sabotage my progress like this? I didn't PMO but am disappointed in myself for the slip. I need to do this for myself but am also relying on you guys to help keep me on the right path.
  2. Bobo

    Bobo Well-Known Member

    You didnt pmo! I feel that with every slip a lesson is learned! You are gonna be ok. Noone judges you here.
    Gilgamesh likes this.
  3. Saville

    Saville Well-Known Member

    Like Bobo said, drop the disappointment. :) We've all done too much of that in our lives. Great job!
    Gilgamesh likes this.
  4. Boxer17

    Boxer17 Active Member

    I agree. Many times when I have time off and feel aimless just starting to do something is so helpful. Even if it's just watering the plants or washing some windows it starts the ball rolling
  5. forlorn

    forlorn Active Member

    Sorry to disappoint but I'm in the middle of a binge of sorts. I've been on a dopamine drip-feeding frenzy for over 48 hours. I haven't watched any tube sites or hard core P. But I have engaged in frequent erotic chat and paid for services which brings my clean streak of 88 days to an abrupt end. This time PMO was involved. It has left me feeling weak and deflated. My dick hurts and so does my bank balance. I could point to a number of reasons why this slip occurred. Ultimately it's all excuses but I'll document anyway to remind my future self.

    1) Struggling financially (not earning enough)
    2) boredom
    3) Twitter
    4) dealing with a life threatening incident that occurred a few days ago involving a loved one
  6. Bobo

    Bobo Well-Known Member

    There will always be a reason to repeat over and over. You must just do the best you can and move on. Need to drop the blame and to use a word " stick-to-it -ness!" Eventually you will succeed but you must keep going even when you dont want to. We all know how discouraging it can be at times.
    forlorn likes this.
  7. Gilgamesh

    Gilgamesh Seize the day

    Been there recently. It sucks to relapse after such long time. We should learn to deal with uncomfortable situations in a healthy way. Never give up!
    GreyHeron likes this.
  8. forlorn

    forlorn Active Member

    All in all my binge lasted around 5 days. It was more intense than previous times. This morning I brought it to an end and afterwards I felt a sense of loss and confusion. It has almost felt like there were too many hours in the day and I haven't known what do do with myself.

    Earlier I looked out my window and caught a glimpse of my next door neighbour, a GP (Doctor) standing in his garden. He was unaware of my presence as he was smoking a cigarette and staring at a screen. I know I shouldn't have but I couldn't help to look to see what he was watching. I observed for a minute or so and saw he was watching porn. I don't know why it surprised me but it did.

    Thanks for the encouragement. You're right, I need to pick myself up and keep fighting.

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