Thanks @Boxer17 Working on career goals has helped in some ways. It's given me something to focus on, and it's not purely a distraction, it's something important. If we're going to stress about stuff, it makes sense to stress about the stuff that really matters. I'm still worried about my career/finances but slightly less so now that I'm taking action. I felt a wave of fresh anxiety this morning. It stems from the fact I'm in a sexless marriage and that I'm not doing anything about it. I bury my head in the sand and think the problem will just resolve itself. But of course, that's not true. We never had much of a sex life mainly due to my performance anxiety/lack of confidence. But at least we used to try. Now the intimacy has vanished entirely. We live like friends rather than lovers. It's been about 5 years since we even attempted to have sex. I think she's accepted that this is how our lives will be, although deep down she resents me. I don't know how to repair this damage but I think the first step has to be communication (I'm even nervous to bring it up with her). We don't talk about or acknowledge the lack of our sex life. I've always been more aroused by fetishes than by a desire for sexual intercourse but part of my brain tells me that's wrong and I that I should try to pursue a healthy intimate relationship. I already feel deep regret about not trying to establish a sex life but I'm paralyzed by a fear of failure. It was painful for me to even write this post but important that I acknowledge the truth, so I can be held accountable, by myself - and by others on this forum.