Time to heal

Discussion in 'Ages 40+' started by forlorn, Nov 28, 2018.

  1. forlorn

    forlorn Well-Known Member

    I'm the guy that checks his phone every few minutes. Constantly looking to see if I have any received any messages, getting a buzz of validation every time I get a notification or hear a ping. At least, that's how it has felt for the last few weeks. So yesterday I did a 24 hour technology detox - no music, no TV, no phone, no computer. I think it was a valuable exercise, it allowed me to create a little break and re-evaluate the way I spend my time.

    Still haven't done any work on putting together any kind of vision for my life. Thanks @Gil79 for your suggestion about active visualisation. I will look into this approach because currently I am struggling to mentally connect to any type of vision. I remember reading somewhere that people who struggle to put together life visions are actually struggling with the issue of mortality, i.e. accepting that in life we only have a finite number of paths/experiences. Since I have a completely free day today, I will focus on making plans for the next 5 years, as Gil suggested. When I've tried doing this in the past I've always found it difficult and I have typically added a lot of detail, but maybe you're right, i.e. that too much detail can sometimes get in the way because it can create self doubt.
    NCBob and Gil79 like this.
  2. forlorn

    forlorn Well-Known Member

    I have finally put together a vision (goal/plan) for the next few years of my life. It's not perfect, but it's a start. I took a whole day to think about it (what could be more important?) and eventually narrowed down three main areas to focus on. I did this by identifying the 'must dos' rather than the 'should dos'. Broadly speaking the areas I chose were relationship, career and self development. Already I feel as if it's given me the impetus to use my time more effectively. I have a sense of direction, something to aim towards instead of plodding along and seeking temporary distractions. I'll be reviewing my vision daily, monitoring to see if I'm following through with the habits that move me towards my desired goals. I'll also be trying to visualise myself achieving these goals and living the life I want.
    Gil79, Thelongwayhome27 and Saville like this.
  3. NCBob

    NCBob The 11th commandment: Thou shalt not peek:-)

    I can relate, forlorn. There was a time when I craved that external validation, which I needed to validate my significance. Today, not so much. When I focus on bringing my authentic self into the world, that seems to do the trick. Who would have thunk that it was an inside out proposition:D
    Sometimes the medium we use can greatly impact our ability to create this vision. Some people work best with visuals/pictures, some with detailed outlines, some with sounds/music as the catalysts, some with conversations with others, some using meditation, etc. Finding the right medium works wonders. Good luck!

Share This Page