Time is fleeting, life is passing, and I'm stuck and stranded on a lonely Island

Discussion in 'Ages 20-24' started by auzzie_mikey, Jun 14, 2014.

  1. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Yes but I have terrible insomnia. I don't know why. I m already on day 83. I have to take clonazepam to fall asleep but again I wake up with no energy. What about the rest of the symptoms?
    Like shriveled pennis etc that I mentioned earlier don't you had them?
     
  2. auzzie_mikey

    auzzie_mikey Active Member

  3. auzzie_mikey

    auzzie_mikey Active Member

    Day 98

    Just sort of stabilising at the moment. Can actively and consciously feel the urges.

    Just taking deep breaths and keep reading my post to remember this journey is now for a life-time. Never ever to ever give into this temptation again. Let me die due to the extreme amount of urges,but I will not surrender this white flag this time
     
  4. Freedom from Servitude

    Freedom from Servitude Active Member

    Keep on going my friend, you're doing brilliantly. Hell is the price to pay for short term gratification. It will all be marvellous for a split second, and then you will get hit by suicidal despair and depression once the deed is done.
     
  5. auzzie_mikey

    auzzie_mikey Active Member

    Words of wisdom my friend. I have copied your words into my daily readings that I read. I read it this morning when urges were too high.

    Must be aware and conscious at all times.
     
  6. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    I feel you are lucky at least you are having urges. I m feeling asexual on 87 th day.
     
  7. Freedom from Servitude

    Freedom from Servitude Active Member

    Stay in contact and keep posting regularly. I wouldn't have gotten as far as I have without the support of the SA fellowship.

    There is a difference between a natural healthy libido and the urge to indulge in porn. It is a good thing that you currently don't have the latter.
     
  8. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Also I observed there is this strange one drop of water( Probably) that comes out of my pennis after 2-3 min after I pee.
    I don't know why. But does this thing happen with anybody else too?
     
  9. auzzie_mikey

    auzzie_mikey Active Member


    Day 101 for me. I am doing nothing more than focusing on this journey. It is all my life's happiness that depends on this journey. I will do anything to retain on and keep on this journey. No surrendering. All aboard the ship.
     
  10. jack91

    jack91 Find your way throuh Staff Member

    I love and respect your attitude!!
     
  11. auzzie_mikey

    auzzie_mikey Active Member

    Jack91..... I have been in this journey now since 2014. We have the knowledge of how detrimental this thing is for us. If we have the knowledge and still don't use stay clean, that what is the point. I have been through the depths of hell and keep suffering through this thing. We must fight it head on. And you my friend have helped me a lot in this process.
     
  12. auzzie_mikey

    auzzie_mikey Active Member

    when I had the worst withdrawals between Feb to 1st May 2018, I really thought that I was going to suffer all those negative symptoms all my life again. You really can't see light at the end of the tunnel. Now I have this kyptonite... there is no surrendering. Rather I die, or this PMO dies.... there's only 1 way out. Need to solidify and strengthen this thing forever and ever. Never ever forget what this PMO has done.
     
  13. jack91

    jack91 Find your way throuh Staff Member

    we are already out mikey, we just need time to change this godlike determination to true success!
     
  14. auzzie_mikey

    auzzie_mikey Active Member

    it is 1am here where I am at the moment. My mind is ON RED ALERT. I am still studying. Mind is trying to wonder. But I can feel the true control of my mind. I am living right now what I lived through in withdrawals. I can sense the pain that I suffered in withdrawals. The disgust of that, and the feeling of just thinking of waking up tomorrow feeling mentally fine and beautiful is what keeps me clean. I will not surrender at any cost this time.
     
  15. auzzie_mikey

    auzzie_mikey Active Member

    Day 103
    It gets so tough at times with these streaks that urges become so high but you gotta hold on.

    At my toughest testing phase right now.
     
  16. auzzie_mikey

    auzzie_mikey Active Member

    Urges are too strong today. It's really killing my mind and existence. But I've thought to myself. I know what the end is going to be, forget the heartrate increases, its just alla rtificial, all fucking fake bullshit. So if I know the end result whats its going to be, just sit back and relax and consciously let the wave of urges pass through. Give it all this TIME. Read my daily post. THATS THE WAYYYYY BOIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZz
     
  17. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    I wonder how you are having such urges. I am asexual these days. It doesn't feel anything downstairs.
    It was day 90 for me today.
     
  18. Freedom from Servitude

    Freedom from Servitude Active Member

    Hang in there, mikey. We are all rooting for you :)
     
  19. auzzie_mikey

    auzzie_mikey Active Member

    Day 108

    Focus on no temptations and no arousal. That is the mantra and add to another day of no pmo.

    It has become my lifestyle now.
     
  20. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    I must tell you that you must be happy to have strong libido. Is not towards real women. If so then it is healthy just try using the energy into some sport. I m not at all feeling anything for women.
     

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