Since I recently turned 30, I decided to create a new journal in this section and lock my old one. It's still there, so there won't be any introduction or such here. A short recap of what's happened during the last two months: At the end of July I got caught in a chaser-relapse cycle which has haunted me since then. "Just one last time" has been a reoccurring thought. Have I learned anything? Yes, I know that I will eventually face extreme horniness and urges but I know these can be avoided by walking away from it all. Go outside, do anything to stay away from the computer. I also know, more than ever, that I'm never going to be safe. I can't let down my guard, not for a very long time at least. Even an ad which would be considered tame can be fatal to me. It's currently been nearly two days since I last MO'd. I've made it a habit to MO before I sleep, and this is pressure point #1. #2 is weekends. I have been able to go 4-5 days without PMO during the last months, but the weekends always get me. I think, if I can get through one weekend I will feel much more confident that I can actually beat this. As I've mentioned before, I'm building up a lot of frustration at work. I've got way too much to do, and this makes me want to comfort myself. I think you can guess with which method. This is also going to become a problem, but I can deal with it in other ways, I'm sure. Simply lying down and relaxing helps a lot, as does walking.