The Cake is a Lie

Discussion in 'Ages 20-24' started by InsideOut, Aug 26, 2012.

  1. InsideOut

    InsideOut Guest

    Got some additional intel and decided to back up with this. It seems like the risk with one car only is way too excessive — road accidents are extremely frequent here and it will likely stand more than move and all that. It will be at any degree secure and profitable with at least two or three cars at once. Probably will look into that in the future, but not now.

    Therefore, currently filtering out other ideas to make cash. There are some, but there are the same problems as with all of my affairs throughout my life: disbelief in success, weak motivation from possible rewards, fear of committing and "doing not the right thing", in addition to general apathy. Also getting problems in university, I'm late on exams.

    My roommate brought his girlfriend here today to watch movies. We discussed this matter previously and I'm ok with that in general, but reminders of my own forever-alone-niness like this are quite painful, lol.
     
  2. InsideOut

    InsideOut Guest

    To be honest, university is my main pest and deal killer right now. Summarizing points:
    • I didn't chose it based on my own perception and free will. My parents told that it's "needed" to get high education, and I had no direction in my life nor I didn't know what to do and where to go, so I surrendered.
    • Perspectives with diploma are very unclear in there. Higher education is generally plagued with corruption and negligence, there are many gays who finished it yet know nothing about their specialties and so on. So getting it won't open any tangible possibilities, likely.
    • On the other hand, I already spent more than to years, so it can be bitter to drop out.
    • Considering the above, I have very little motivation to commit to education, and I have numerous examples of guys who already settled in in their lives without diploma.
    • Due to the lack of motivation, I procrastinate and feel bad about it all the time. Also feeling guilty for not doing the work, so unable to have fun to the full extent too. "I need to prepare", and this kills all my possible start-ups now.
     
  3. InsideOut

    InsideOut Guest

    It feels like my memory has improved. I am better at remembering numbers, names, events and whole parts of conversation, even in cases when I didn't play much attention .
     
  4. CleanHands

    CleanHands Guest

    Very inappropriate to post here, but she's hot. ::)

    Anyway, can you please remove it? I mean, this place is supposed to be a safe haven from temptations.
     
  5. InsideOut

    InsideOut Guest

    There always ve temptations, everywhere. I see like this one on streets — does that mean that we should lock ourselves up and live as hikkikomori?
     
  6. CleanHands

    CleanHands Guest

    Tempting to do so...but not really worth it. I completely understand your point. However, it's also essential to respect other members This is a community of healing and a safe zone until people feel ready to perhaps browse the net without K9 or whatever. For that reason the picture should be removed. I personally don't give a crap about it and have no urges, but I know there are many others here that would be upset.
     
  7. InsideOut

    InsideOut Guest

    Replaced with a link, then. Strange thing, having no urges while looking at girls (both real and depicted). Only the aesthetic part, which is not what I'd prefer to feel. But it is the smaller problem than looking to find a direction for life.
     
  8. InsideOut

    InsideOut Guest

    The link was less than 100 symbols long (and no one forced you to look) and your post took up the whole screen. Chill out and free your mind from that stuff. There is no surprise that you struggle with chaser effect when you put so much analysis and force of mind into every pixel of the screen.

    You don't need to open every link you see in the first place. Period.
     
  9. InsideOut

    InsideOut Guest

    Exactly. If it was your thread, then I'd consider yourself right. But you came here and try to establish your own rules in there. Isn't that selfish? Or double standard? You don't know me that long to label also. Calm down, I tell you. Take a wider look on things.
     
  10. InsideOut

    InsideOut Guest

    I just can't figure out what prevents you from pressing Ctrl+W, continuing this disgraceful drama.
     
  11. kees

    kees Who took the cool out of the coolidge effect?

    Hey InsideOut,

    Don't be a bully and remove the link, pretty please. It's really inappropriate. You can't say: Then don't look. You know just as well as I that it doesn't work that way.
    And the people are right that you may expect this site to be completely smut-free.
    I'll give you a chance to modify before I report to the moderator.
     
  12. CleanHands

    CleanHands Guest

    ^Agreed. It's like putting a bottle of vodka in front of an alcoholic and then say "Well, don't drink".
     
  13. InsideOut

    InsideOut Guest

    I'm out.

    Controlling sexuality no longer has any noticeable effect on my well-being. Therefore, I gain nothing from reboot attempts anymore, but only a nagging in the back in my mind. It also indicates that there are bigger things that should be dealt with first. So from now on I consider myself free of all this. It doesn't mean that I will binge and so on, but it also doesn't mean that I will stick to the "clean", purist approach. I will let matters flow as they wish.
     

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