Sissy hypnosis addictions make me wanna kill myself, ugh.

OP hasn't been online for almost a year. I do hope he visited a doctor who could help him figure out the truth. I've also been a victim of internet diagnosises. It's extremely dangerous to blindly take advice from the Internet when it comes to severe issues like this. Suggesting a very hardcore/hardmode reboot (no porn, no MO, no fantasy, not looking at women) to someone who is so emotionally vulnerable is extremely irresponsible.

 

+1

 

But what if they know they're addicted and the only way out is cold turkey? I felt extremely irresponsible and stupid after I quit cold turkey but it was the source of all my anxiety and depression. I wish I could've quit in a different way other than all at once but I don't think there was another way because once I used porn I felt normal again. Once I started abstaining past X amount of time I started to not feel normal so I would've had to quit eventually right?

 

It's not irresponsible. It's the only way out, which many of us have had the misfortune to find out through trial and error.

You don't want to get better because your life has been shit so long you have forgotten how it can be and you're afraid of the unknown.

 

I always have a dilemma about this, but I think when it's HOCD (or similar) the person has to quit cold turkey. Anything else would be to continue feeding their issues - issues that keep driving them to seek solace in porn.

I am hardcore about rebooting. Only abstinence-based cures work. People can talk about moderation management all they want, but that's dreamland. In reality, you ain't going to cure yourself of watching porn by. . . watching porn!

What am I supposed to say to the OP - stay off porn weekdays but enjoy Sissy Sundays in the privacy of your own home?

I accept that some people talk about tapering off, but I don't get that, either - ultimately, you have to start living without your security blanket (porn). I also think MO to fantasy is only one step removed to doing it to porn.

Ultimately, it isn't just about not watching porn - it's about rebuilding your life so your done wanting to watch, whatever your kink. But that can only begin when you stop watching porn.

The OP's just lucky I didn't tell him to take cold showers, do push-ups, run 5K, stand up straight, tuck his shirt in. . . etc.

 

I am writing all in an informal manner.

Let me tell you this first: No psychologist/psychiatrist has really found answer to this issue. Try to search treatments for paraphilias. None is effective according to modern science. I have suffered a lot because of this issues. I always wanted to get rid off it. I hated myself. I felt disgusting of myself. I felt :Why the fuck do I orgasm on such humiliating experiences.

I am just trying to explain my personal experience and understanding. And I just intend to help you guys with my best possible understanding. And the thing that I am saying is my personal experience and understanding. Its a very complicated psychology and it takes efforts to understand. Try read about Sigmand frauds ego defense mechanism first. This think has been explained in Hindu Vedic scriptures 5000 years ago!! I am not preaching any religion friends. Just trying to help you all.

Its actually so difficult to define mind and thought process. I dont know in what part of brain all these occurs exactly but there are 4 parts of mind according to scriptures. And you(the consciousness) is the controller of mind. Mind is also called subtle body.


1. Man (I believe it closely resembles ID in sigmand frauds theory):
It produces thoughts and desires. Eg. I want to have this car/woman/ money..so lets stela money

2. Buddhi( superego)
tells you that you cannot steal!!It discriminates right from the wrong deeds

3. Chitt:
Contemplation..constantly like in the back of the mind.....steal....steal...money...money..money...woman..woman..woman

4. Ahnkar (ego)
I am going to steal(identity)

antahkaran — ‘Inner faculty’. The complete mind which comprises of four aspects, each characterized by its individual functions: called the man when generating thoughts and desires; the buddhi when consolidating thoughts, making decisions and resolutions, forming convictions, or discriminating; the chitt when repeatedly contemplating or focusing; and the ahamkār when forming a sense of being. Normally used in the singular since all four are aspects of the one antahkaran, but also often referred to as being four different antahkarans.



And btw the current psychotherapy works on the principles of Sigmand Frauds therapy. Sigmand Frauds theory has been aceepted by modern science. Its just a theory but it explains a lot. Sigmand Fraud missed one component of mind:chitt.

Now example of an ego defense mechanism:
displacement: your boss insulted you and you would get home and yell at your mom.

EGO DEFNSE is an "UNCONCIOUSS" process!!! you can only go backwards in time and find out you spoke something just to defend your ego. There different ego defense mechanism.

Like the fox says grapes are sour because he is not able to get it(ratinalization type ego defense). He does not realize at the time of speaking that he is defending his ego. At that time he indeed believes grapes are sour. But in future if he would try to think why he said so He would relaize that he said so just because he could not admit that he is not capable of getting the grapes)


So now my theory of understanding masochism/sissy hypnosis/submissive erotic stimulation:

When you orgasm your ego defense does not work. You know the truth. You are mature enough to know that truth.
You have a lot of lust (lust=discharge of semen) ( according to scriptures..A guy who does not have semen discharge at all:waking/sleeping/dreams any state, does not have lust at all. This is a perfect state and close to impossible for an ordinary person. One of the ultimate goal is to conquer lust and not let your semen flow out. And even if you do for the purpose of recreation you do it without experiencing pleasure. This is a deep concept in itself. Its beyond the scope of this comment)

You have a lot of lust(your mind is enticed by a thought of extremely beautiful women). But your Buddhi knows that its beyond your reach. YOU ORGASM WITH THE THOUGHTS YOU BELIEVE IS POSSIBLE FOR YOU TO GET IN REALITY.(eg you know you are in no way capable of seducing a extremely attractive woman and you are extremely attracted by her) . so you end up being a slave of the women/you dress your self as a pretty woman.

And I believe as long as I am not able to control my semen discharges. I will always be somewhat a slave of physical attractiveness. In a similar manner some people are slave of money/power.

In your heart if you really dont get attracted by physical body of a women, Lustful women will be drooling over you. Only when you REALLY REALLY do not get at all attracted by physical body of a woman.

It took me time to realize my whole life till a few months back has been revolving around getting a woman. I wanted to be rich cause lustful woman like money. I tried to look very attractive/confident...so much effort for that!!

Now if you try look closely to practice of worshiping Gods in some culture, You will find striking similarities with BDSM. eg feet worship of God..loyal servant..ultimate surrender..
Instead of loving person with pure heart as we end up loving physically attractive person..we end up with masochistic orgasms.

Now the end part , I am not trying to preach anything. Just to explain how certain spirituality(and possibly reality) is extremely powerful fighting all these perversions. I am not trying to challange anyones belief here. Just providing my perspective
Buddhism/Hinduism believe that the consciousness is distinct from the physical body including brain and mind. Eg you could have been born with extremely low intelligence, low attractiveness. Once you die you enter a different body. I found this concept very intriguing. None knows anything for sure. Though there are many cases suggestive that this might be true. Try searching for Ian Stevenson. The soul does not have gender. That means you(the consciousness) does not have a gender.

So now you have absolute faith in God and the concept of Soul. you escape all the defense mechanisms and you end up in ultimate bliss. Your confidence goes sky rocket. You end up loving everyone. You are humble(zero ego, zero desires=no conflicts in mind).

You dont end up being a sadist/seducer/dominant now. If you do you are still suffering and you are using Identification as an ego defense.

 

Be confident: if you are a good person. With humility, compassion and love. You are definitely better than people who get pleasure from being sadist.