Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service? - Visited an Escort Today...

Discussion in 'Pornography Addiction' started by evgtrees, Dec 26, 2012.

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  1. TheUknown

    TheUknown Gonna Quit Fapping And Porn For forever now.

    Re: Is Craigslist Safe or Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service?

    Ok lol your going for the easy way out. You won't be proud of yourself when your done with it.
  2. evgtrees

    evgtrees Member

    Re: Is Craigslist Safe or Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service?

    So, I went to an escort today. She gave me unprotected oral sex. I was really hard in her mouth. Her tongue was piereced and later I noticed that I have a cut on the tip of my penis. I tried to put the condom on for penetration, but my penis went soft, and I couldnt have the actual intercourse. She told me that I came in her mouth, but I couldnt feel me cumming. When she tried to blow me 2nd time with the condom on, I came with it. There was no way I could've penetrated her, and she won't give me any more time, although I paid her for an hour. She told me she is clean, she mostly does BJs and even brought her own condom, but I am still worried about getting an STD.

    Now, speaking of experience, it was nothing like I ever imagined. I pulled her towards me so that we can do a long foreplay, but she was really concerned by the time. Receiving for the first time, the oral sex was amazing, but the entire encounter was mostly emotionless. I have to repeat, there was NO emotions from her, something that I expected her to give me. I became a complete wuss, and had massive performance anxiety. My throat was completely dry. I couldn't believe she wanted me to use her and leave her... I don't even know what to say anymore.... I lost my money and got a very little in return....
  3. TheUknown

    TheUknown Gonna Quit Fapping And Porn For forever now.

    Re: Is Craigslist Safe or Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service?

    Don't feel bad. Just go get yourself checked for STD's. Also, we did tell you like a thousand times not to do it.
  4. evgtrees

    evgtrees Member

    Re: Is Craigslist Safe or Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service?

    I know, you guys were really trying to save me from this, but I couldn't control my emotions. I didnt even get to touch and feel her the way I imagined..... :'(
  5. nowsthetime

    nowsthetime Do Your Best, Then Do it Again.

    Re: Is Craigslist Safe or Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service?

    Well, as we always have heard careful what you wish MIGHT get it...and you might not...there's lots to be said about going about something like this the old fashioned somebody, develop a relationship, want to be super close to her in ways that go beyond a sex act, and have the sex act happen anyway, and be amazing....for both of you.

    What's done is done....

    Don't beat yourself up to much, and don't drive yourself crazy about STD...I'm willing to bet that you are fine because she was all about condoms.

    The first time, the loss of virginity, the world is full of horror, and funny and lame stories about that, including alot of stories like yours, where people went to a hooker or an escort...very few people get that magical loss of virginity movie moment...

    Focus on your PMO problem.

    If you can conquer that, alot of things, good things, will open up for you.

    In following this thread, you were going out of your mind about wanting SEX, and so OK, but one could read your thread and read your words and really conclude that you were obsessed with the idea....and you are not alone around here with that thought, myself included, but you can also look at all of that and see how it was all just too much, too heavily weighted, and a priority in your life, and yes I know you were incredibly frustrated...I'm not judging you...talking to you like a friend here.

    You had people telling you go for it and others telling you not's REALLY OK that you chose as you sucks that it wasn't what you hoped for....I'm sorry it went that way for you, but don't beat yourself up now about it.

    LET IT ALL GO....

    I know its easier said then done....but it's over and you need to move forward as soon as you can.

    Try your best to focus on eliminating the PMO problem....I think almost everybody here, who has beaten that problem, or has gone a month or two clean even, can tell you about all kinds of things that have gotten better and opened up...READ THEIR STORIES...I read a thread about a guy in his late 20's that sounded like you, and what an amazing recovery...all about how his confidence grew, he started to be more social, looked people in the eye, started working out, and on and on....I'm sorry I don't have the thread...if I find it I will link it to you.

    go to the your brain on porn site and find the benefits section and read that will inspire you, show you what's possible.

    Good luck...I'm hoping on good things for you, and everybody here.
  6. bork_gray

    bork_gray Beaker doesn't "bork" like the Chef.

    Re: Is Craigslist Safe or Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service?

    Oh, drat. Then, would everyone else stop being moronic, please? :p
  7. nowsthetime

    nowsthetime Do Your Best, Then Do it Again.

    Re: Is Craigslist Safe or Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service?

    By the way, just because this first time was not good for you, doesn't mean that the amazing, special, loving and close, totally awesome, and deeply emotional, connected experience with somebody you really love and who loves you back, isn't still out there, waiting for you.

    But you have to believe that, and you have to go find it, and work for it, and make it happen...and the search, the journey to it, is all part of what will make it all those great things.

    Is it a difficult journey? Yes, it can be.

    But so's already been difficult for you.

    Set your target and start going, be sincere, do the best you can, and things will show up for you along the way.
    It's been working like this from the beginning of time.
  8. evgtrees

    evgtrees Member

    Re: Is Craigslist Safe or Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service?

    I am not sure if I am still a virgin or not, my penis touched her vagina but didnt go in. I dont care if I still am. I got an oral sex, did something sexual, and I don't feel like a "little good boy" anymore.
    I would say that today my problem was mostly about performance anxiety, with PE. When I told her she is the first woman in my life, she was shocked and then I got very uncomfortable and scared. So, I had to cover it up, and tell her she is my first escort woman, but my heart was still beating fast and thorat was dry. I couldnt focus on sex or receiving it. I shouldnt have told her that. Plus she took control over me, cuz I pussied out, and that messed up most of the things. It was mostly the performance anxiety, being with a woman, touching her, and then doing her at the same time, bc, I had several morning erecitons past few days, and last year, before starting out my no PMO challenge, I MOd with/wo a condom on, and I lasted for a good 20 minutes.
  9. newday323

    newday323 Member

    Re: Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service?

    Don't worry about it Wantabetterlife! In time you'll have good sex with good partner(s), just stay focused on rebooting and gradually working up your confidence day by day. Also, if you're interested in meeting girls without all the negatives of paid sex you might consider joining an online dating site. I've had some good experiences with okcupid, a free site. Also, I've found is a great way to meet girls even though it's not designed specifically for dating but just for meeting people with shared interests.

    Just keep in mind that any frustrations you're having are temporary and things will get better. I never ever thought I'd get to where I'm at (though I still have a ways to go) but I stayed focused and have progressed day after day. You can do it too. Good luck buddy!
  10. evgtrees

    evgtrees Member

    Re: Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service?

    Right now, I am freaking out getting an STD from her. I got a cut on the tip of my penis from her tongue ring. She told me she was clean and even brought condom with her for the real sex. But what if she doesnt know if she has an STD?
  11. TheUnderdog

    TheUnderdog Active Member Staff Member

    One of the reasons you didn't enjoy this experience is because you're not sensitive enough yet. You still have porn induced ED. You still need above average stimulation in order to get excited. You do not get aroused by little things such as caressing her body, kissing her neck, licking her nipples, grabbing her ass. You couldn't even get hard enough to penetrate her.

    Second reason you didn't enjoy it is because you got an inexperienced and/or mechanical prostitute, which happens about 35% of the time. A prostitute that worries about time is always going to be a mediocre experience. It doesn't matter if she gives good head. If she rushes foreplay or doesn't let you fully enjoy her body then she's clueless about sex. You will always regret these experiences, and they are unavoidable. There are bad prostitutes, average prostitutes, good prostitutes, and exceptional prostitutes.

    The third reason you didn't enjoy it is because you're completely ignorant regarding STDs (I don't blame you though). You got your dick sucked once. Big deal. You will not catch an STD. The little cut on your penis makes no difference. The mouth is an extremely hostile environment for STDs. Saliva is not infectious either. And when it comes to HIV you're completely safe. In the history of HIV (30+ years) there has been no documented cases of a man catching HIV by getting his dick sucked. You're not going to become the first.
  12. Connoisseur of Lotions

    Connoisseur of Lotions Proactive Rehabber

    Re: Is Craigslist Safe or Should I Go With Backpage Escort Service?

    I wasn't trying to save you, I told you to goto the review sites beforehand, had you done so you could have found the GFE... and be singing like Akon right now.

    Go to a free clinic and get screened if that'll put your mind at ease. Dude, don't fret so much. A few weeks from now after you've beaten PMO, PIED, and being P whipped, this
    will be a funny story you tell over beers.
  13. TheUnderdog

    TheUnderdog Active Member Staff Member

    Don't even bother going to the clinic unless you get symptoms on your dick, which I know you won't.
  14. gameover

    gameover Age: 26

    Look dont worry about the STD's you will be fine. If you really want to be safe then wait a week or 2 then go to a clinic.

    About the experience. I told you that you were not ready... you watched porn like 4-5 days ago. I couldn't get hard to penetrate until a few weeks no PMO/MO and especially with the nerves you need the sensitivity and some arousal there to get you going.

    Look at the positives. You got a blowjob and you came from the women and not your hand even with a condom on. In future if you ever do it again i would only buy 30 min cause kissing and shit isn't usually on their agenda.
  15. CidGuerreiro

    CidGuerreiro Well-Known Member

    I don't want to say "I told you so", but... I told you that you shouldn't expect any emotional feelings from her. Seems like you also got a bad one, rushing you on something that shoul be enjoyed slowly.

    As I said before, sex with hookers is awkward. It will always be awkward and you shouldn't expect it to be anything close from real sex (or sex from movies, including porn). Unless she's the most extrovert, friendly and easygoing hooker around it will always be emotionless. I believe such hookers are a minority among the class.

    Anyway, you did it, now drop it. No use bumping your head on the wall. Use it as a conclusive proof that you need some serious reboot until you're ready for something like that.
  16. gameover

    gameover Age: 26

    Pretty much this. I went to a hooker cause i didn't know were i stood sexually... if i was going to get hard at all or if i even would want to have sex if the girl was there ready for it.

    Just showed me how much further into this process i have to go and its what is keeping me focused.
  17. evgtrees

    evgtrees Member

    I had massive Performance Anxiety. I was thirsty, and my hands started to shake and I couldn't concentrate on what to do. So I started to talk to her, and I was expecting her to makeout with me and etc. I was also looking forward to a long foreplay, but nothing like that happened. She was mostly rushing to get over with it, although she gave me a fantastic blowjob. She wasnt completely emotionless, she talked to me herself, but was more focused on her job, and didnt even care about how I felt towards her. When I left, I told her politely, "I am gonna go now," she didnt even look up or even kissed me goodbye. She put on her clothes, and said ok. I was speechless.... :'(
    I didnt know much about good/bad escorts, I thougth I am paying her so she will please me and make my dreams come true. Speaking the emotions and feelings, she was really nice and soft when we spoke over the phone, so I thought she will also be like my gf would be. After I got out of her house, I just stood there on the street and couldnt believe what had just happened! I lost my physical desire to have sex. I am going to concentrate on rebooting and being more productive with my life now.
  18. fapfreeforme

    fapfreeforme New Member

    dude - what were you expecting??? you paid for a service. a service was rendered. deal complete.
  19. evgtrees

    evgtrees Member

    Shit, I just found out about this whole upselling thing. She took my money before we did anything, and in the middle she was rushing. Oh well, whatever had to happen, happened. I wont dwell on this anymore.
  20. lookingforlove

    lookingforlove looking to have meaningful and satisfying sex

    Well good, you got that out of the way!

    All of our experiences are for the best:
    they are lessons, and you just had one: maybe a tough one, but those are the most memorable lessons: they etch into your brain so you can remember them.

    Will you go see an escort again to see if you can get the emotions you want?

    Has this distracted you from opening up to those that can help you?
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