I've given up on No Porn/ No Fap. It was a nice idea, that I had found the source of my problems and/or that I could be fixed. One good thing about the Internet: It's the only place where you can honestly say how you feel. I spend most of my free time convulsing on the floor with hysterical noises and facial expressions and sometimes crying. I try to run, but there is nowhere to run. No escape from this terrible place (earth). The most positive thoughts that I had today were of running around naked or jumping in the ice-cold ocean. All the others were a lot darker.