I am carrying this over from the 20-24 rewiring league. This is Day 0: I just broke. However. My trip is on the 18th. I KNOW I will not be in working condition if I slip up even once until that time. My motivating factor is not to not be in dread. I can be quite comfy jerking off to porn, playing video games, working my job and hanging out with friends, sleeping with the odd girl here and there. My inner voice hears this dialogue and answers with a resounding FUCK NO. I will be amazing. I will be great. I will make myself a champion, the stuff of legends OR I will die trying and spend every waking moment dedicated to exercising my inner bitch. I'm either in the process or I'm not playing at all. One is acceptable and a birthright, one is confining myself to mediocrity. Also. Listening to Tolle and mediating an hour a day are clearly having a huge impact on my life and my thinking. It's still not enough though. It's not enough. I still get angry and feel that tension and tinge and one of the biggest differences between how I'm living now and two years ago is the lack of exercise. With these extended work hours I don't make time to hit the gym super hard and sweat out my anger and tension. And when that happens I kind of just implode...cave in on myself from stewing in the pressure. I'm going to start hitting the gym HARD. I'm talking 5-6 days a week consistency. This will require the correct diet. Done. And correct sleeping patterns. On the way. There is a constructive outlet for all of my energy...and then there is porn. I have no doubt in my mind that this will GREATLY impact my meditation. Put me more in touch with my body and grant me greater knowledge, mental and emotional control.