Hey ComebackKid, I just want to begin by saying I'm impressed by your determination to keep going and keep working to quit this addiction after several years and several journals. Also, well done on all the little victories that you have achieved along the way, including going 150 days and 50 days, but also the smaller streaks as well. I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling with this addiction but you clearly have a lot of strength within you. I had one thought for you based on the kind of language that often came up in your earlier posts (eg. telling yourself that you're a bad person). This is something that worked for me and helped me quit smoking cigarettes. I realised that the voice in my head telling me not to smoke was the voice of my mother telling the child me that I'm a bad boy. It wasn't helpful because what does a bad boy do? Be bad. When I realised this I started to speak to myself like an adult. I would say to myself: "I am an adult. I can choose to smoke cigarettes if I want to. I am allowed to. It is not illegal. I am an adult and I can make my own choices. But, I don't want to because its bad for my physical and mental health and its unattractive to women. So I choose not to." Saying that to myself gave me more self-control and will-power. I smoked about 10 cigarettes over the next 3 years. I "relapsed". I "failed". I'm not perfect. I'm only human. But eventually I quit. You can do the same with porn.