Rediscovering the real me

Discussion in 'Ages 25-29' started by Queen|s Gambit, Jan 23, 2015.

  1. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Really indulged myself in P. Come to the same conclusion as I always come if I don't fap. P is just dopamine rush. When the novelty effect rubs off there is NOTHING.

    With fapping something just clicked in my mind. I don't see myself fapping. I am not a fapper. I don't fap. I want to quit for good.

    Never came close to fapping even after discovering some new content. The content is getting better and better. Just scary. Can't imagine what this VR stuff is going to do. Also...it just hit me.

    Watching P is like taking a shot of digital cocaine. I like that expression digital cocaine. This is what P is. And it never delivers. The ultimate high is always just around the corner.

    I soo need to quit P. I don't need to N days. I need to quit forever.

    I'll still wait a few days. The willpower super focus on no-fap works. Getting a bit restless about P. I am starting to feel the need to quit P in my core. Soon.... not yet totally 100% sure I can stop the willpower super focus on no-fap.

    Wishing good luck to everybody here.
     
  2. Hey man, I see you're similar to me in the sense that peeking = pleasure.
    What current safeguards are you using to help yourself stop peeking?
     
  3. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Currently, none. I committed 100% of my willpower into no-fap. I am not a fapper. I do not fap. I don't edge or do any other physical stimulation for that matter. I keep my hands to myself.

    The reserve in willpower really helps. Never came close to danger zone.

    Yesterday I indulged a bit in P. But after 30 minutes all the excitement just disappeared. Even different P didn't do it.

    I am hoping that sooner or later I will lose interest in P. Just like I did with computer games.

    Without PMOing, P is just not that exciting.

    I want to get to at least 50 days no-fap before starting to commit some willpower into no-P. Divide and conquer.

    When you peek, do you feel urges to fap? If soo, are they strong?
     
  4. lanister

    lanister Member

    Hi qg,

    sounds like an interesting way to get rid of it. And yes i know the content is getting better and better and i think the VR- porn will make even more people being hooked on this. Digital cocaine fits very well.
     
  5. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    30 days no-fap. About fucking time!

    Ironic, watching P makes me want to fap even less. I am not a fapper. Fuck fapping. I do not fap.

    Really wanted to make myself O from P stuff alone. The body just doesn't work that way. P only works on arousal. After arousal fades there is nothing. Time I stop with this shit.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tni74ocFxtQ
     
  6. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Went too far with P. Just wanted to see if I can O from P. I cannot. This is the 3rd serious attempt at this. I am a very stubborn guy. Enough. Fapped (quite literally took 2 strokes) to relieve the pressure. Now I am ready for a proper reboot. No P, no M.

    Here I go. This will be my mantra in the morning and evening and any time I feel tempted. Will tweak it along the way.

    Is P ruining my life? What if I'll stop watching P? Will I have a healthy positive relationship with a woman?
    Am I a fapper? What if I stop fapping? Will I have more energy?


    Google: "interrogative self-talk"

    Let's do this!
     
  7. bikeguy

    bikeguy Member

    Just curious, but why did you even want to experiment whether or not you could orgasm to porn? That seems counterintuitive to me.
     
  8. Hey man, stop playing with fire.
    You already know this is not good for you, or your health.
    Stop it. ;)
     
  9. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Good morning. Today is a brand new day. Will I make it a P free day?

    @bikeguy Curiosity. Heard about this thing called hands free and full body orgasm. Not everybody can do it. I can't. But I think I came close. It is that cake is a lie thing. Where the ultimate high is just around the corner. And the corner never comes.

    @sb you're right. I like to find unorthodox solutions. This is not one such case. Reboot it is.
     
  10. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Good morning! Today is a brand new day. Let's make it a P free day!

    Day 2. Yesterday I did OK. Massive urges when I went to bed to watch a particular P video. Just crazy shit. Didn't watch P.
     
  11. RoryMac

    RoryMac Guest

    Good. You know how this works. The longer you go, the easier it gets! So hang on!
     
  12. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Good morning. Another brand new day. Another possibility to make it a P free day. Let's make is so my good friends. The time is now.

    Day 3. Yesterday, went for a walk. Had massive urge to run home and watch a particular P scene. I actually thought this is going to happen. But I said to myself. Let me think about it some more. Then I remembered. The cake is a lie. P is a con artist. It promises a lot but never delivers. IT NEVER DELIVERS on its promise. Didn't watch any P or hypno for that matter.

    In bed trying to sleep. Very horny. Ended up MOing to PIV fantasy to a girl I know in real life. It felt normal.
     
  13. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Good morning. Another fresh day. Let's make it P free.
     
  14. RoryMac

    RoryMac Guest

    Fingers crossed, I'll do the same!
     
  15. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Good morning! No matter yesterday. Today is a new opportunity to make it a P free day.

    Tempted to watch some P. Didn't. Fantasy is still a problem. But last night when fantasizing another insight.

    Inception. P installed the fantasizes I am having. If I never watched P, I never would fantasize these scenes.
     
  16. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Tired from the work week. Low on willpower. It was either relapse to P or M. I chose M. A quick PIV fantasy. It was over very fast. I'll try the opposite approach. No-P, but if I really need to, I'll M.
     
  17. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    YES! I want to be free of P. And I don't want to fap.

    It is just soo hard. The urges. It is crazy. Crazy, I tell you.

    Currently my willpower is on the level. I can to a high degree prevent a P or M relapse but not both at the same time. Something has to give.

    I'll try to go this time 30 days no-P. And put mind wandering down to a minimum. I might or might not M.

    Divide and conquer.

    Feeling like having a cold. Feel like shit. Slept till 11.00. Can't wait to go to sleep.
     
  18. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Good late morning. Today is a brand new day. My good friends let's make it P free.

    The no-P, maybe-M is harder than no-M but P. I like a challenge.

    Feeling like having a cold. Can't believe it is only 6 days since I last see P video (or hypno).

    I experimented a bit with binaural beats to make me O. Again. Failed. The cake is a lie. But one good thing about the experiment. There are lots and lots of good binaural beats on youtube that help me relax. There are very little studies done about this

    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/11191043
    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17309374
    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/24294202

    Yesterday I listened to this when going to sleep. Pretty nice. I'll try if for a week and evaluate weather or not I should quit.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKkGAj5Ripg
     
  19. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Just sent my landlord email to say I am terminating the contract. 2 months time to evict.

    When I bought the car everybody and I mean everybody said to me: Wow, you got an awesome deal! For the apartment everybody and I mean everybody said I got a bad deal. I am paying too much. There is private parking but the parking lot is incline and there is like a ditch between the private parking lot and the public road. A totally botched job. It annoys me every day.

    Soo, here I go again, on the apartment search. 2 months should be enough time. In the worst case I'll go AirBnb if I ran out of time. Funny enough the rent is almost as high as the AirBnb rates.

    Today went pretty smooth. I got busy. Visited my grandparents. Cleaned the apartment, etc. Smooth sailing in terms of P urges.

    Now off to bed. I'll listen to the video I linked above.

    Time I get busy.

    Hope everybody is moving forward. Even when you are falling you are moving forward.
     
  20. Queen|s Gambit

    Queen|s Gambit New Member

    Good morning! Again. A brand new day. A brand new opportunity to spend it P free. My good friends let's make it soo.

    Fantasied a bit yesterday in bed while listening to the video. But the fantasies are tuning down a bit. A good sign.
     

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