@R3balance, thanks for your support man. I think I've had so much help from my accountability partner. It's nice having someone on call who I can just talk to about all of these issues. It makes me feel more normal knowing that this is just another problem, like a sprained ankle, or something. I hope you're holding up okay, man. I've been a little AWOL lately. -- Hey guys! I know it's been a really long time, but honestly I've let life become busy. That's what I've always wanted, ultimately. To build a life that is bigger than the worst parts of me, to eclipse my old self and so I can become something better. There are loads of things that I'm really proud to report: I've started a YouTube channel, I know loads more songs on guitar, I've been on a hiking/climbing trip each weekend since my last post, and I've embraced this new confidence about the future that I haven't had in a really long time. I get a lot of feedback from people about just going into software engineering/programming and truthfully my heart was never in it, and I'm okay with that. As long as I can afford food, a roof over my head, and the clothes on my back, I'm okay. My future is mine to make. I'm currently making videos as my ultimate hobby outside of my work and guitar, because it takes up a lot of time planning, scripting, and editing videos. It's such a productive time sink that I get too tired to think about even PMOing, and when the thought occurs that maybe I could, I realize I'm simply too tired, and just go to bed. It's been very eye-opening. I think the way out of this, to properly rehabilitate yourself, is to find something you're obsessed with. Currently, it's making videos, and I'm so proud of myself for discovering this. They might not be the quality that I know I'm capable of, but I'm really proud of them so far. If you guys want to check it out (note: there's only 2 videos... for now) the link is below. I'm hoping to have another one uploaded by tomorrow, and I want to reflect and connect with people on a deeper level through it. I'm excited to embrace this vulnerable side of myself, and I hope you guys can come along for the journey too. Let's keep up this hard work together! Kind regards, T.