It's one of those periods where work is quiet, I'm home alone and have nothing to do. However, I'm feeling a renewed sense of positivity. Generally things are moving in the right direction but I'm aware a lot more needs to be done. I'm in a sexless marriage and it's painful for me to even think about this. I quite often block it out but maybe talking about it here will ease my burden and spur me into taking action. Harsh but painful reality is better than unhelpful, comfortable delusion. I was watching a fictional TV show yesterday and observed how casually people have sex and how comfortable they are in themselves. It felt a world apart from my view of my own sexuality and my lack of confidence. On some level maybe I think I'm unworthy of having sex. In my head I've made up various excuses why I can't do it. I've always considered sex to be shameful, perhaps because of messages I received when I was young. I need to face my insecurities head on and believe in myself. The focus for the next few days will be on learning self acceptance, acknowledging that sex is natural, healthy and nothing to be ashamed of. Reducing anxiety, learning methods to overcome PE.