PIED update during reboot

Discussion in 'Ages 30-39' started by Bilbo Swaggins, Aug 9, 2020.

  1. Saville

    Saville Well-Known Member

    Hey, bro. What I've found over the years is that if you go looking for something wrong you'll usually find it. That's not to dismiss what you're doing and certainly not how you're feeling. But, we can keep searching for that "magic" pill, that one determinative test, that will finally set us to boner-dom, but I found this is an illusive dream. I'm over 60 and obviously I have less testosterone than you. I have been overweight my entire adult life (fat is bad for the hormones) and mostly out of shape...I'm a real catch, in other words. :D Anyway, I can still get a boner and cum PIV. I don't get as riled up as I used to and I would say my erections are not as strong as even in my 50's, but the pork sword still works. Of course, we're all different, but I found the most important organ is between our ears.

    When I was all nicey nicey with the wifey the only way I could cum is if she beat me off. Sometimes I'd go soft in her hand, she'd complain about a sore arm because it was taking me so long, and my only way out was looking at P. Being nice, considerate, kind, deferential to our woman's needs is, imo, a chump's game. I got my mojo back by behaving like a caveman. Think of it this way: when you're a teen you try things like booze, pot, piercings, hair cuts, etc, to find out who you are and where you fit. The kids who don't try those things end up, usually, acting out in their 40's, like I did, and start cheating and other shit. What I'm saying is "we" are powered-down because we haven't practiced being powered-up! A pattern started when we were young. It wasn't just P that ruined our boners, it was being forced (due to childhood circumstances) to hide who we were. Because of this we meet and end up with people who enable us being powered-down, because that's what we know and are comfortable with. We keep trying to change, but it is like trying changing the curtains in a prison cell. We're still in prison. Luckily, the prison door can be opened easily and it only takes a little bit of courage. Deep down you know what you have to do.

    There is no perfect diet, supplement, or exercise routine. Imo we must connect with our primal selves, even though to our previous selves this looks like the kind of ass wipe we've always hated. Things are always best for my penis when I feel like "me Tarzan, you Jane. Let's fuck!" The old me would have thought that person was a knuckle dragger, but because I didn't get to practice knuckle dragging when I was young, I became every woman's little bitch.

    You've got this!
     
  2. Shady

    Shady Well-Known Member

    @Bilbo Swaggins I agree it all sounds difficult and scary at the beginning, but with the right memtality and the right support, you get there eventually. One way or the other.
    We'll all meet here few years from now and think back about our journeys and discuss how easy it has become.
    Stay strong, buddy.
     
  3. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Thanks, man.

    Yeah, since those guys seemed to have much lower testosterone than me, I am not expecting the same results they got. I don’t really have any expectations, actually, but I still want to give it a try.

    The doctor I’m seeing is offering all kinds of treatments, but most of them are related to skin, wrinkles, etc. Hormone therapy is just one of the treatments she gives. At the clinic, they use bioidentical hormones, which seem better than synthetic hormones. On their website, they explain in detail why and how they do hormone replacement therapy, and it seems to make sense. I’ll give it a try, and if after a little while my libido doesn’t improve, I’ll just stop the treatment. Of course, I’ll follow the doctor’s indications if I decide to stop the treatment. Actually, I will talk to her about that before starting the treatment, to make sure I do this the right way.

    All the hormones you mentioned are included in the lab request. My urologist never checked my estrogen (estradiol), so I’m looking forward to get the results.

    Thanks again for dropping by and providing such insightful advice. Sadly, I haven’t progressed enough in the last 14 months to be sure my issues are only related to porn, so I’m exploring other avenues. Hormones is just one of them, and even though it’s a pretty drastic avenue, I’m willing to give it a try. I’ll do it very carefully, though. If I heard correctly, I would get a cream and not injections, and it sounds less invasive. But I’ll make sure to do some research before to try anything.

    I’ll definitely have a look at the posts from Bounce, thanks for mentioning it.
     
  4. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Thanks Saville. Your post wasn’t easy to read, it kinda hit me where it hurts. I still don’t know if my ED is caused by porn, psychological issues or physiological issues. All these avenues seem to make sense to some degree, even though I know my imagination can play tricks on me. I don’t enjoy trying all these things - seeing a physiotherapist while I don’t even seem to have issues with my pelvic floor; spending hundreds of dollars to meet with an anti-aging doctor and trying TRT while my testosterone isn’t that low; doing hard mode despite being in a relationship… I’m also on the waiting list to see a sex therapist, and hopefully with her I could explore the psychological dimension of sex and desire. As you pointed out, my lack of self-confidence, assertiveness or maleness is probably playing a big role here. I’ll have to work on this. But I have to admit that it sounds like a huge task. If at this point I can’t expect anything more from TRT or abstinence from porn, then it means I have really, really serious work to do on my attitude towards sex, women and life in general. Interacting with a beautiful woman, or seeing my girlfriend naked has almost no effect on me, and it never did. Masturbating without porn or fantasy is almost impossible to do. Not to mention the total absence of morning wood for the last 15-20 years…

    Well, let’s find out. Thanks again, Saville.
     
    Last edited: May 27, 2021
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  5. Deleted User

    Deleted User Guest

    Hmm well, 19 nmol/l isn't too bad really. I think if you tuned your life up (obviously I don't currently know how you live) it would probably improve.

    I've had a few measurements over the years ranging from 24-29nmol/l and when my testosterone was at it's peek, I literally couldn't get any blood flowing to my pipe when I was being stroked by an attractive Woman.

    In terms of 'tuning your life up', I'm sure you will receive plenty of professional advice but I will also offer mine.

    The 3 biggest things I can suggest are: Sleep, reducing 'Endocrine Disruptors', and Nutrition.

    Sleep: "Why We Sleep" - By Dr. Matthew Walker

    Endocrine Disruptors: "Estrogeneration" - By Dr. Anthony Jay. Lots of "holy cow" moments in this book.

    If you cbf reading these books, they've got podcasts out there. You can probably gather all you need from googling "How to sleep better - Matthew Walker", but the Estrogeneration book is well worth the effort.

    Nutrition: This one will vary a fair amount from person to person. I know a few PhD level nutritional science people at my University and we have long-drawn nutrition conversations weekly. I won't go into too much depth, nutrition is really a personal journey but a good starting point is to decrease sugar, increase protein, increase greens and try some fermented foods (kefir, sauerkraut, apple cider vinegar). In terms of resources, my friend speak very highly of Dr. Gabby Lyon, she has a free pdf 'The Lyon Protocol' on google.


    General Health stuff: 'Nourish Balance Thrive' Podcast.

    I'm not at all discrediting TRT. I actually think it's great, but generally there are more natural solutions for our problems. Even if you took TRT for say 8 weeks and decided it didn't help PIED or anything reboot related, you could come off and almost certainly return to your baseline level of Testosterone. So it's probably safe to try. It's just when you get to taking it for a very long time it can become difficult to regain your natural T. I have a few friends who do testosterone enanthate for 8-12 weeks 1-2x/year for bodybuilding purposes and they have healthy T levels when they're not juicing. But, remember I'm just some random internet guy, just food for thought.

    Your counter is really climbing mate. Fucking excellent.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: May 27, 2021
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  6. Deleted User

    Deleted User Guest

    Don't take this all to be your fault. Remember, we live in a world where it's generally frowned on and in some cases literally illegal to act too manly. Unless you're a professional sports athlete, there isn't much room to act particularly Masculine in this world.

    Look at the world now, compared to what it once was. In history is was the norm for men to smash rocks apart, melt them down to liquid metal, shape them into sharp objects and then march in random directions for untold amounts of time until they found things to kill, fuck and eat - That was Men. Our primary social function was hunting and protection, that no longer exists. Now we're told off as BOYS if we even play wrestle. It's drilled into us from day 1 that aggression is basically original sin. It's no mystery why guys are depressed and meek. I recall a fact I once read, "Only animals in captivity have been observed to masturbate", it's very telling about modern man.

    The only times I've had meaningful pockets of reality in the modern West have been when I'm training martial arts. If you've never done a martial art, I suggest you try it my friend. Boxing, Muay Thai or Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu

    A book I can highly recommend: Iron John by Robert Bly.
     
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  7. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Thanks for your posts, Universal. I appreciate your advice, support and encouragement. You wrote a lot of interesting things, I’ll definitely keep them I mind, and might read the books you mentioned.
     
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  8. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Hard mode, day 45

    I’m halfway through, and I’m still alive. Yeah, still alive :cool:

    Have a good day, guys.
     
    Last edited: Jun 2, 2021
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  9. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Hard mode, day 56

    Still fighting the good fight. Had sex again, though, and this time things went further. Definitely not the cleanest streak, but it’s not the end of the world, porn and masturbation are still out of the picture. Still want to get to 90 days of hard mode. Not perfect, but still good.

    Meeting with the anti-aging doctor next week. Many people here don’t seem to fancy TRT, and I can understand that, but it’s something that has to be considered in some cases. I’ve joined a TRT forum to ask a few questions recently, and it’s funny how that forum is similar to YBR. There, you see all kinds of people with different problems (many of them have libido issues) who try to improve their lives, but they look at things from an hormonal perspective, while we look at it in a brain-related way. (Of course, we all do more than that, but you get the idea…). I’m still interested in giving it a try for 2-3 months and see what it does to me. Many guys report countless benefits, like improved self-confidence, better sleep, better motivation, higher libido. Seems that many guys combine TRT with daily Cialis, which is something I’ll consider at some point. When I use Viagra, sex is really enjoyable, and I don’t have to worry about my erections. Of course, I’d prefer this to happen without TRT or ED pills, but it’s better than nothing. Sex is fun when your dick is working, no doubt about that.

    I’m a bit annoyed about how things happened with my physiotherapist. I stopped seeing him after 4 meetings, and even though I believe him when he says he doesn’t think I have CPPS, I don’t have a good feeling about it all. I always have pain in my genital area after sex, it’s not just in my mind. Of course, thinking about it excessively will make it look worse that it actually is, but there’s definitely pain and discomfort in my pelvic area after sex. Last time I saw him, I really didn’t like how he subtly suggested that it was all just in my head. He asked me, ‘’Did the pain start after you began reading about CPPS?’’, and things like that. Boy… Didn’t like that. I know I can sound desperate sometimes when it comes to ED, and that a part of me is looking for that magic pill that will solve it all, but that doesn’t explain everything… Anyway, it’s still a good thing I saw him, he showed me some exercises that I still do every morning (glute and adductor muscles), and thanks to him I’m pretty sure I don’t have trigger points in my pelvic area. But I’ll still have to get a second opinion, especially if when I start having sex again I notice that the pain comes every time. It’s not fun, I really hate looking like a mad man who doesn’t trust doctors… I think he didn’t really understand what I meant when I said I was a chronic edger for years, with sessions that could easily last 60 or 90 minutes. Even if he knows that, he still thinks I have to do some Kegels to strengthen my PC muscle… I don’t know, doesn’t really make sense to me. I’ll have to be more specific about this if I see another physiotherapist one day.

    And finally, I went through a few negative events lately, related to work, neighbors, landlord and friends. My girlfriend is still in a pretty severe depression. I don’t say this to complain, I mean, that’s life. But it showed me that balance can be very fragile. I started drinking more (though not as much as I used to) and to have poor sleep again. I’m sure I’ll get over this. But I’m clearly a very emotional guy who easily gets overwhelmed by his emotions. Guided meditations and exercise help me with that, but it’s a constant fight. I’d love to be able to say ‘’Well fuck them, I don’t care’’, things like that. But that’s not how I usually react to unpleasant things. I usually start boiling inside, and it takes hours before I move on. That’s my own special way, I guess. Things could be worse, definitely. But what a journey, what a ride…

    Getting close to the dreaded ‘500+ days without porn and masturbation’ signature. Damn, I don’t know what to think about that! I’m proud about myself, but at the same time I can’t help but thinking, how the hell do you reach the highest rank without being cured lol…
     
    Last edited: Jun 13, 2021
  10. Saville

    Saville Well-Known Member

    No, it's not in your mind. I have had pain the odd time when ejaculating and I believe it originates in the prostate. If the gland is a bit swollen then it can send pain to various places. Certain foods create inflammation in our bodies (if you are sensitive in that way) and it might be worth a try eliminating a few of the usual culprits, such as gluten, dairy, corn, etc. I would also recommend taking an Omega-3 supplement.
     
    Last edited: Jun 14, 2021
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  11. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Thanks, Saville. I’ll definitely keep that in mind. It can’t hurt to give it a try.
     
  12. I remember I saw huge changes about 550-600 days in. More specifically, that's when the ED meds started to work and transformed my sex life. After some months, I didn't need them at all. Changes usually are subtle, keep a wether eye Bilbo ;)
     
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  13. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Damn, that’s crazy. We don’t hear that quite often, I tend to forget that for some guys it takes more than one year or even 18 months. Thanks a lot man.
     
  14. Rudolf Geyse

    Rudolf Geyse Well-Known Member

    Bilbo, your posts are really appreciated. I like how you take a balanced look at yourself, openly report your ups and downs. Thanks man and I hope it goes well with you.
     
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  15. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Thanks, Rudolf, really appreciated. This forum is a very nice place where we can talk about our struggles without censoring ourselves, it’s priceless. Hope you’re doing well too.
     
  16. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Hard mode, day 65

    25 days before I can f*** my girlfriend again :cool:. My dick might not be working as well as I’d like it to, but sex is still one of the greatest things in life. 25 days…

    Finally had a wet dream. Took a while! Doesn’t necessarily mean anything, I’m just not the kind of guy who has one every 10 days when he’s not having sex. Still no sign of morning wood, though. But I’ve been sleeping very well in the last week, I’m grateful for that.

    I had my meeting with the anti-aging doctor, and, as expected, she gave me a prescription for testosterone. Actually, she prescribed 3 things: testosterone, progesterone and vitamin D. She said, though, that she doesn’t think my ED is caused by a problem with my hormones, since my levels are not bad. She still thinks that it’s worth giving it a shot, and that I’ll probably have other benefits from the treatment.

    I’m not starting the treatment right now, though. I still haven’t decided if I want to do it or not. I’ve made some research, and it seems that there’s not much danger in giving it a try for 2-3 months. One interesting thing: the doctor told me that bioidentical hormones, which is what she prescribed me, don’t shut down your own production of hormones. I was really surprised to hear that, because nobody on the hormones forum I subscribed to ever mentioned anything like that. In all cases, trying it for 2-3 months doesn’t sound very risky, and even though 2-3 months isn’t enough to find the good dosage, it’s probably enough to see if there are some benefits to the treatment.

    Before trying hormones, I’ll try something else, a little supplement kit that seems to be helpful for guys with mild ED. I’ll start this next week and will try it for one month: L-Arginine, L-Citrulline and Pycnogenol. If anybody is curious, here are the links to the studies that showed the benefits of these supplements for ED:

    https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12851125/
    https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21195829/

    I figured it would be best to try softer treatments before to try Testosterone. Daily Cialis is still on my mind too. Before my reboot, daily Cialis wouldn’t do the trick, but today, with the progress I’ve made, it could work. I used to need 100mg of Viagra and today 50mg is enough, so there’s a chance that daily Cialis will work. I’d really like that, it would allow me to have a more spontaneous sex life. We’ll see how it goes.

    That’s about it. I’ve got a few options in front of me, and of course I’m still staying away from porn and masturbation (and even sex right now), so overall, it’s positive, I’m definitely not going backwards.

    Summer is here! Enjoy, guys :D
     
  17. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Okay, I’ve got a question. It’s the kind of question you’d expect from a newcomer, not from a guy like me, but I gotta say I’m not 100% certain my ED is porn-induced. After all there is no real test for that.

    When I get intimate with my girlfriend (kissing and cuddling), I usually get a boner. It stays around for a little while, a minute or two, then I go soft again. If we keep cuddling and kissing, I’ll get hard or semi hard again a few times. My dick is definitely working, though not always enough, or long enough, for penetrative sex. My question is, why do I have so much precum in my underwear after moments like that? What the hell does it mean? I’m aroused, otherwise I wouldn’t release that much precum. But why do I release precum, without having a good and lasting erection?

    I know this question sounds weird, and that I’m probably overthinking. I’m just a little confused, I don’t know if I have psychological issues, or only PIED, or a mix of both, or something else. I really don’t have the worst case of ED, but its causes are still unclear to me.

    Often, guys report releasing semen when they pee, or have a bowel movement (semen leakage). That’s NOT what I’m talking about. I’m just talking about big amounts of precum while I’m cuddling or kissing, without having a very good erection.
     
    Last edited: Jun 25, 2021
  18. Babylonier

    Babylonier Member

    Bilbo I did not hear of this problem before now. But i read a lot about chinese medicine. They tell us about that when you have rectile problems it may be a kidney problem. Try to google is. Acupuncture and rectile problems. I used some Chinese herbs.(lei wei di huang or six form) They really worked for me. Now I think my erections are pretty normal. Also having morning wood is coming back and is stronger then a year ago. It is not really expensive the herbs. The therapy/acupuncture sessions is little bit more expensive. But is is going to help you out! I am positive of that! But you have to be aware you don’t go al the way when you’re erections come back and you think you’re sixteen again. If you don’t want to you can google food to make you’re kidneys stronger.

    god bless you brother!
     
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  19. This is normal and expected. I experience it and most men I think.

    On the other hand, semen leakage is something different, I don't know a lot about it to be honest but I don't think it is that common, and most probably it is something that should be investigated furthermore by a specialist.
     
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  20. Saville

    Saville Well-Known Member

    I noticed this exact thing when I began cybering, before I cheated on my wife. I guess you could call the cybering a gateway drug. So many online things lead us down miserable paths. As I typed to these women (hopefully they were female lol) I would have precum spilling out everywhere. My wife even commented about my underwear being so stained, because I was leaking precum everyday. I finally started washing my own underwear in the sink so my wife wouldn't investigate further, because every single night I was cybering, it was as much a narcotic as P ever was.

    I thought it was cool that I had so much cum and such great boners, it meant that my parts were working...until I cheated with a woman the first time. I should've known better, because I felt completely disassociated. She was hungrily devouring me and I felt almost nothing. But, my dick was leaking precum all over her, even though I couldn't maintain a decent boner. We tried fucking and it was a colossal failure. I felt exposed, vulnerable, shell-shocked and she felt undesirable and stupid. It haunted me about why I couldn't maintain an erection when it was so hard while cybering. I also felt horrible about myself, because it was my job, after all, to please all women and I had let down the great matriarch. (this is another discussion, but an important one) We met a few more times and I eventually was able to have PIV, but it was never that great.

    Unlike with P or cybering I couldn't flip to a new clip. Fucking for me was tied up in P use and fantasy and a real live person just did not get me horny. After the disaster of the affair I got back to my old ways and soon I had the precum leaking out like Niagara Falls, again. So, what was wrong with my dick? The answer is: nothing. I thought that because I could get hard while cybering with random people that I would also be able to fuck random people. No, and the reason wasn't just that I was hopelessly addicted to PMO, cybering, and fantasy, but not every woman is going to turn your crank.

    My wife, even though she can be a fucking narcissistic bitch, turns me on. This is why once I got over my PMO addiction I was able to have successful PIV sex with her. One weekend we fucked three times and that wasn't that long ago. Remember how you responded to the massage therapist? It could be bilbo that on top of your contorted view of sex you are not sexually compatible with your gf. She is someone you're used to and she is safe, in the sense that her response to your sexuality is predictable.

    Overcoming sexual dysfunction isn't just quitting P, it is uncovering that essence we all have inside that makes us uniquely us. There is nothing more subversive, more rewarding, that being our true selves. Right now you are running around looking for a magic pill to make you well. Meanwhile, the magic is inside of you. You don't need more days away from P or sex, you need to just allow yourself to be a whole person, a healthy male, because you are one.

    I'm sure what I've written hurts a little, but deciding we're going to be our own man does hurt. We're literally tearing off the old dead mannequin skin and emerging anew. Anyway, at the end of the day this is just my opinion, but it is an opinion based on years of trying to fix the fake me when the real me was just waiting to be acknowledge.

    You are already well!
     
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