I understand your frustration as your are apparently doing everything right without yielding the full reward. In my mind, it makes the flawless abstinence for more than a year even more impressive. Talk about perserverance. The peace of mind mind will come, once you will have recovered. As unpleasant as it feels, your emotions simply tell you that you haven't reached your target yet, ostensibly. I am not trying to relativize your anguish, far from it, but from an outside view, being content with where you are now in terms of recovery, would even be worse, wouldn't it? You can still work on coming to terms with how things are, if you feel like you tried "everything" and if no further improvements are in sight. Perhaps, this could be the right thing to do at some point, but only you will know and until then keep the flame of hopefulness lit. And even in a scenario, where you do not even see the tiniest bit of improvement anymore, you still have ED meds in your back pocket which worked for you. I know, it's not something that excites anyone, yet would it give you the opportunity to have a fulfilling sex life, pragmatically speaking. If it helps, recovery and progress in life often happen spirally and not in a linear way. Hick-ups don't bring you back to square one and halts may not be permanent.