PIED update during reboot

Discussion in 'Ages 30-39' started by Bilbo Swaggins, Aug 9, 2020.

  1. BoughtWithBlood

    BoughtWithBlood Well-Known Member

    Seriously impressive Bilbo! Well done! I’m happy for you that you were able to live without porn for such a long time. Keep it up :)
    Bilbo Swaggins likes this.
  2. -Luke-

    -Luke- Well-Known Member

    Great stuff Bilbo!

    Hobbits really are amazing creatures, as I have said before. You can learn all that there is to know about their ways in a month, and yet after a hundred years they can still surprise you at a pinch.
  3. MindPoison

    MindPoison Active Member

    Congrats on the record, man! Seeing it really motivates me to try to make it to that amount of days too, especially now that it doesn't seem like a dream anymore :)
    Bilbo Swaggins likes this.
  4. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Haha! Thanks man :D
  5. Shady

    Shady Well-Known Member

    Yaay. Keep going.
    Bilbo Swaggins likes this.
  6. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Things are going well. Daily Cialis is really doing the trick for me, I’m exploring new territory. I’m having sex more often, and I don’t have to plan it anymore. I can initiate sex more naturally, at different times of the day, and in different ways. Sex is becoming spontaneous and easy, for the first time of my life.

    I met with a sex therapist three times. It was nice, she mentioned many interesting things, and she was receptive when I talked to her about YBOP and porn addiction. One thing I liked was the way she looks at what I would translate as "arousal patterns". I was a chronic edger, meaning I would voluntarily maintain a sort of low-key arousal to avoid reaching orgasm. The problem with this is that by doing that, I would always be in a "relax mode" and not enough in "intense mode". The lack of intensification, according to the therapist, can become a problem, as you don’t engage in sex fully. Definitely makes sense to me.

    Interestingly, after 3 sessions, she said that she didn’t think I needed more sessions with her. Of course, there are many psychological aspects I have to work on, but my case is different than most guys with psychogenic ED (she said I was an atypical case). She recommended that I find a new physiotherapist specialized in pelvic rehabilitation, because of the symptoms I have (dribbling ejaculation, pain after orgasm, etc.). Also, when I described to her the meetings with the first physiotherapist I met a few months ago, she said that it was unusual that he asked me to masturbate in front of him. She also criticized other things he did, and she really thinks I need to get a second opinion. I’ll do it. Now that things are going well for me, I’ll be able to explore that possibility without being too emotional about it. A few months ago, each time I explored a new avenue, I would have high expectations followed by inevitable deceptions, it was an emotional roller coaster. Now I think I’ll be able to approach this intelligently, and to have reasonable expectations. But it really seems I’ve got pelvic issues. I just don’t know to what extent those issues affect my libido.

    Last night, for the first time of my life, I was in charge of the barbecue during a supper with friends. I really enjoyed it. When we think about "acting like men" and that sort of things, we must realize that it’s not just hard work, it’s also fun and satisfying. I really enjoyed cooking fish and meat for everyone. Things are going well, really.
    Last edited: Aug 19, 2021
    Pete McVries, TrueDat and -Luke- like this.
  7. -Luke-

    -Luke- Well-Known Member

    Sounds really good, Bilbo! Glad you are doing well.

    I think I missed the story when the physiotherapist wanted you to masturbate in front of him. :D
    Bilbo Swaggins likes this.
  8. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Lol! :D:D
    Yeah, you missed that… It’s not as creepy as it sounds though, he wanted to see with his own eyes how quickly I lose my erection when stimulation stops. Not exactly creepy, but definitely not cool… o_O
    Thanks for the kind words, Luke.
  9. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Wrote to 7 or 8 physiotherapists who do pelvic floor therapy. I explained my symptoms (dribbling ejaculation, pain after sex and erectile dysfunction) and asked if they ever had clients with these symptoms. I also told them I saw a physiotherapist a few months ago and that seeing him wasn’t very fruitful, since he never had a case like mine. So I told them, I want someone who has experience with that. They all answered that they never treated a man who had all these symptoms, or they gave me vague answers like, "Physiotherapy can help you", etc. Seems that finding a good physio for my symptoms won’t be an easy thing.

    Guys like me who used to edge a lot seem to be unique cases. Doctors and professionals don’t always know what’s going on, and how to help you. In the book A Headache in the Pelvis, the authors wrote:

    "Pelvic pain can be triggered and exacerbated by compulsive sexual activity."

    They also mention:

    "At this time we have no idea of the number of men who fit into this category, although anecdotally it appears not to be a large number."

    The first physiotherapist I saw thought I had a weak pelvic floor and that I should do Kegels to enforce it. My sex therapist also suggested that when I described my symptoms. The thing is, I think they’re not completely wrong when they say my pelvic muscles are weak. When I started masturbating at 12 or 13, even before discovering porn and edging, I already had dribbling ejaculation. So I’m pretty sure I really have weak pelvic muscles. But… I edged to porn for 15 years (60 and 90-minute sessions…), and that can’t be good for the pelvic floor.

    Now that I have successful sex on a regular basis, I’m not focused on my erection like I used to, and I can clearly notice that my perineum constantly hurts (not a big pain, but it’s chronic). After sex, it hurts even more, for a couple of hours, sometimes until the next day. Pressing my perineum, even very lightly, doesn’t feel good. There’s something there. Anyway, all this to say I feel I might have weak pelvic floor AND tight pelvic muscles. I don’t even know if that’s possible, though, but it could explain many things…

    Fortunately, it’s not a matter of life and death anymore. Daily Cialis works well, I have a decent sex life now. I’ll just try to find a good physiotherapist, and hope he has experience with cases like mine. At least, I hope he will know about manual therapy and trigger points — the one I saw a few months ago only made me do some stretchings…
    Shady and BoughtWithBlood like this.
  10. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Hey guys, I'll take a little break from the forum. All's good, I just wanna clear my head a bit. Especially now that things are starting to go well, I'd like to close this chapter. At least, I wanna stop keeping this matter at the foreront of my mind on a daily basis.

    Be strong, guys! Do your best, and keep believing in yourselves. When you fall, get back up; and if you've been doing the right things and still haven't reaped the fruits of your labour, stay strong. Don't lose hope, and don't stop trying because you think you're broken or not worth it.

    Go ahead, leave your comfort zone, and step into the unknown. It's not new age crap or pop psychology, it's just advice based on experience. I haven't completely cured my ED, which was my main goal when I started rebooting, but so many other things have changed drastically in the last 500 days. I hope your lives can improve too. There are many, many beautiful things in this world, but we have to look for them. Many of us think we don't deserve those things, and we withdraw ourselves from life. We should not do that. We should try, we should always try. You never know what comes up next. Neil Young says that and his song:

    There's more to the picture
    Than meets the eye

    Take care guys, see you in fall!
  11. Pete McVries

    Pete McVries Well-Known Member

    Take care, all the best to you and your girlfriend!
    Bilbo Swaggins likes this.
  12. -Luke-

    -Luke- Well-Known Member

    All the best to you, Bilbo. Enjoy your time!
    Bilbo Swaggins likes this.
  13. BoughtWithBlood

    BoughtWithBlood Well-Known Member

    Take care man! You’re a true inspiration to many of us. Much respect and best of luck.
  14. Alex_13

    Alex_13 New Member

    In my opinion, pied it is curable only in mild cases. You can put your head in the sand and believe in stories but you can hardly find cases of healing even after years of abstinence and apparent healing after a few orgasms after returning to sexual life pied return !!!.There are new posts of pied problems on this site almost every day, but I can barely find cases of healing, which most of the time are just improvements that lose their effect after a few orgasms.All this does not write that this is how I want it to be ... but I can't see otherwise. I can list dozens on this site since I've been following, not only ,those who have not been cured for years at least I not read any success stories from them, most of them delete the account.You can get improvements by abstaining for months or years and limiting the orgasm max 1-2 per month, maybe you manage to maintain this ,but the question is 1-2 orgasms per month means after you a normal sexual life?The question is do we want to hear the truth, or do we laugh like new becomers "" 3 months ha ha ha "" who after 2 years are still here with minimal improvements or give up and delete their account.
  15. Pete McVries

    Pete McVries Well-Known Member

    Please stop spreading wrong information based on your own perception. Many people seem to register and post to get a few informations and input and then leave without posting their success story. Moreover, you and I don't know about people who reboot by reading-only. Because of the unknown size and outcomes of the group of people who reboot, it is simply impossible to either make a valid statement in one direction or the other.

    There are two valid observations you can make, though:

    1. All reputable studies and reasearch point into the direction that exposing yourself to arousing artificial material decreases your ability to get aroused with a real partner with PIED being the endgame
    2. By removing yourself from the exposition to arousing material over a longer period of time sustainibly and in a disciplined manner, which has caused PIED in the first place, you have a very good chance to recover

    There are severe cases that do not recover or do not seem to be able to recover which is very unfortunate. BUT, and this is based on my personal (flawed?) perception, rebooters who struggle to recover mostly stumble at abstaining from porn which is why they do not seem to see any improvements. The combination of the very addicting nature of porn combined with the ability to access it anywhere in a blink of an eye makes it an extremely tough beast to defeat.

    Personally, I was a heavy porn user for about 15 years, experiencing PIED before tube sites arose and before I was even adult and I was able to have sex after only 120 days of abstaining from porn. I never experienced any flatlines going forward, and I never had to limit any orgasms.

    Giving you the benefit of doubt, I assume, you are very frustrated with your reboot and not someone who just registered to spread misinformation and possibly derail other guy's reboots by stating rebooting is pointless. Hang in there, and make sure to rule out any other possible cause for your ED. Just like Bilbo, the guy whose journal you posted in, does and did.

    Lastly, even if you do not have PIED or even if your reboot does not fix your PIED, in any case, you are way better off leaving using porn for good as it impacts you mentally as well, depending on how much time you waste using it.

    Take care and cultivate patience! It's a tough fight but a battle worth fighting!
    Doper, -Luke- and BoughtWithBlood like this.
  16. BoughtWithBlood

    BoughtWithBlood Well-Known Member

    @Pete McVries 100% agree. Well put into words. Most recover from PIED, as I have.
  17. Alex_13

    Alex_13 New Member

    I don't do everything I write here to give up !!! Unfortunately, you don't have another chance like me or the hundreds of guys just from this site. I also read some pretty credible healing stories .... but too few for how many of us are here ,and there were probably less severe cases I don't think anyone at 18-20 yo can even be a severe case like one who made pmo for 15 years. Improvement exists for sure by abstinence only it is very slow it barely feels a month .... most after the libido increases a little most of them relapses this is another reason why they can not actually be cured. As I read here for for me and for most it reaches 1-2 orgasms and all the improvement is gone.
  18. Alex_13

    Alex_13 New Member

    I have been in a flatline for 5 years !! No porn !! No masturbation, just sex with ed drugs unfortunately ..with my girlfriend.

    Without ed drugsmy dick doesn't work ... The only change I felt after 2 months +of hard mode but it reached a single orgasm sex not porn !!!and everything went.

    I am firmly convinced that that way I never heal if you continue even sex. I spoke with a tantra teacher who said the same thing ... I need 2 years hard mode after which I am allowed 2 orgasms per month !!! Otherwise ed will come back !!! It's a disaster ... that means I will never have a normal life !! And if you think it's only valid for me, you're wrong! She work with thousands of men we all functioned the same way!!!

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