Odyssey of a 20 yr old.( Regular update)daywise journey

Discussion in 'Ages 20-24' started by Mickeymouse, Feb 12, 2018.

  1. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Day 61


    I am required to improve my English my senior have recommended me to watch Sherlock in order to do that. That's available on a prime membership on Amazon. I am in dilemma should I go and purchase it or should I not . There might be every possibility that I might see some shows on prime that might cause me to relapse.
     
  2. varunsharma

    varunsharma Member

    Maybe u can download it from torrent.
    Or you can watch it online on sites like fmovies, 123movies etc
    Also it seems you are doing it on the reboot. Mickey do you know about any porn blockers on smart phone?
    I have bought a new smartphone and I have relapsed many time on it.
     
    Mickeymouse likes this.
  3. varunsharma

    varunsharma Member

    *you are doing good on your reboot.
     
  4. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    M
    No bro no idea. But the forum had some info regd that if I recall.
     
  5. varunsharma

    varunsharma Member

  6. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Day 65

    I had the same pre-cum leak yesterday too because I was sitting beside the girl. Is it common? I really want sit in the front. But somebody else is picked first so I am not left with other option then to sit beside her. I tried to distract myself like I opened YouTube and started watching something comedy but still it happened. I also took stairs to climb 8 floors perhaps that might have also caused the leakage. It was only after I reached the washroom did I notice that. Also since the past 2 days every now and then I feel slight discomfort in my right side of testicular region. I have no clue what it is.
     
  7. varunsharma

    varunsharma Member

    I also get precum when I think of sexual things.
     
  8. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Day 73

    The slight discomfort that I had in right testicular region is not there. I still struggle with sleep issues and tiredness and pains after I wake up. I work in night shifts.
     
  9. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Day 76

    I am more tired then usual. My back is aching yesterdat was quite tedious and the sleep did not help me recover the tiredness. I just woke up from a sleep but sleeps are not rejuvenating. My joints still make bad noises. I have no clue why they do so.
     
  10. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Day 80

    I need to take calls everyday as part of my job and help customers resolve their issues. I feel very drained when I wake up after a night shift I feel like I will have to go and repeat the same process again and again. I have a bad stomach today. I am not generally having good bowels moment I don't know why. Perhaps because I work from 5 pm in the evening to 2 in the night is to blame.
     
    Last edited: Jul 13, 2019
  11. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Day 81

    I went to a urologist he did physical examinations and wrote some test. He wrote complete urine picture , uroflowmetry , ultrasound of abdomen and reasoning of scrotum . As I was tight on time I couldn't go for ultrasound. I am afraid I will be busy with work in the next week and when will I get time to go ahead with the tests.
     
  12. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Day 85

    I had to do an Over time at office. I am already getting consumed with the 9 hr shift and on top of it I had to do 2 hrs extra. It's literally draining me. When I take the clonazepam sleep and wake up I feel like I have not slept. The good part is I still managed to go for my walk. I just pray to Allah SWT that he ends this trouble of insomnia for me.


    Ameen!
     
  13. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    I m commuting to my office while I write this. I feel like crying. I am emotionally overwhelmed. I don't know why. Perhaps because of the job, it all depends on metrics i.e how many yes's i get from customers for the help i give them on phone. I cannot anticipate how my day can be every day has some or the other customer with a situation in which I cannot provide help and he might just hit a "No". I feel like thanking everybody who puts an effort to ease my life. Like my dad who had been providing me food etc, my mom who cooks unconditionally. I feel like no human should be feeling what I feel currently. I pray to Allah that he eases each and everybody's difficulty. I have no complains to Allah I know he will make things good for me.
     
  14. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Day 87

    I do a night shift and I feel like my digestive, excretory system has gone on a toss. I feel drained at my job. I pray to Allah that this ends soon.
     
  15. varunsharma

    varunsharma Member

    Bro, I an going to start my job soon, in about a week. I am going to another city for my job. I have relapsed a lot in the previous few months, the latest being yesterday. I feel sleepy and tired as well. Today my mom told me that do your job with full dedication, but Dont take unnecessary stress, stay happy and healthy, no matter what happens. She said that for her and dad, I am the most important person and my health and my happiness is very important for them.
    I recovered well during the last year, but after continuously relapsing,i feel i am back to square one. I also get afraid sometimes and worry about what will happen in the future. But one thing I have decided is that I will try to stay happy, and hopeful of the future.
    I also want you to do the same. Try to stay happy and healthy. Your parents love you a lot as well and all they want is your health and happiness. Try to keep them happy, try to think less, just stop your thinking for sometime throughout the day, just to feel at peace.
    We have to live our life and do work even with these mental symptoms .thinking about Our parents can be a good source of motivation.
    Don't think much about the future,stay present focused, let things happen for a while, try to stay at peace and appreciate the love of your parents.
     
    ronkumar and Mickeymouse like this.
  16. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Yes you are right Varun
     
  17. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Day 89

    My chest panins when I wake up. Perhaps it's a effect of clonazepam. I really need to get rid of clonazepam. I don't know how.
     
  18. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Day 91

    Yesterday I feel like quitting job. My job is stressful. But when I went to to job today thinking anyhow I am going to quit I felt much better. I did not feel like quitting.
     
  19. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Member

    Day 92

    I have quit my job it was getting very stressful. But I really need to learn to manage stress. Having job stress and on top of it having sleep issues makes you more upset . Now that I have quit I really need to make myself busy with something or the other.
     
    Professor Chaos likes this.
  20. Professor Chaos

    Professor Chaos Active Member

    We’ve all had bad jobs and we have all left them. That’s how you find the good jobs! By not staying in the bad ones. Really proud of how well you have done!

    Good job.
    PC.
     

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