Yesterday I relapsed. Normally, before I came to this forum, this would have been much a bigger deal. Even though I dont feel nearly as motivated as I did on my streak, I feel okay. And most important, I feel like it does matter if I binge for days or not. I feel like getting back on the path and keep going. Thats progress. And now it is time to understand more, to get closer to a good sexuality. Because what I find always make me relapse are the same things every time. First, wet dreams/sexual dreams. This makes me fantasize, which is what happened yesterday. It comes with this feeling of powerlessness, like it is not meant to be escaped. I try to keep my mind on other things, but I always come back to fantasizing. Only the movies I knew there would be sexuality in seemed interesting. And nothing that is not sexual seems interesting at all. I keep it at bay for some time, but the sexual thoughs always come back, and they never go away for long. I don't think I have ever managed to not relapse when this happens. Sometimes I have sexual dreams and it doesn't make me fantasize, but when it does, boy is it hard to stop. So my question here would be: How do you keep the urges at bay? What are some tactics I should try out? Second, stress/sadness. One of the good things that comes from not looking at porn for me is more vibrant feelings. Being able to cry, laugh and care more for others. Sometimes though, the feeling of sadness gets to big, and I use porn to escape. I have realized this, escapeism is very real in me. When I have to many tasks at hand, and feel like I have no way to cope, just masturbating and forgetting about it all is the easiest. Which of course is not functional at all. So my question here would be: How do you deal with the hard feelings? How do you either accept them, or repel them? I want to say that I am thankfull this forum exists, it makes me hopefull for the future. It has helped me grow, and it is wonderfull to see how it can transform lives. Thank you everybody.