Discussion in 'Pornography Addiction' started by TheUnderdog, Nov 28, 2013.
Man, you're awesome. I just checked out ways on how to get more aroused during sex, and I found this portal. I thought I have already "accepted" my addiction a long long time ago until I read your post. I'm glad I did not ignore this post. I'd do what you said, step by step. Thank you.
Almost 100% perfect.
Highest point : Readjusting Your Sexual Expectations
Where you fail : Thinking About Sex is USELESS
Sex is wired into our brain. Not thinking about sex is impossible, period. You can do that for a day, a week, but it will eventually come back, no question ask. Maybe genetic can change that, but still to be seen
Let's not tamper with nature, it knows best. Everything is balanced perfectly after years of evolution until we come along and decide to screw it up, such as with the case of porn.
Great group..couple of asides:
I'm in the early stages of my journey since now in my 30's I seem to be experiencing a bit of ED.
Likely a combo of MIED and PIED.
Wife has a great body, always had. (BC destroyed her sex drive though, we didnt find out til later after things started coming back)
Never had a problem engaging women and getting laid, I dont lack in any real confidence
I'm kind of the do everything type, lot of irons in the fire, social, athlete etc.
Started w/ P back in the AOL days. I was like 13-14. Never really stopped. Adderall got introduced to the sitcho in college, that likely didn't help. High sex drive didn't help either, could M to Edge once or twice a day and still perform very well with the s/o.
Welp here's to re sensitizing myself
Honestly, when I got your automatic PM I thought you were putting yourself in a pedestal believing your thread was some sort of massively helpful breaktrough. When I get into forums and some mod asks me to "read this thread first" I never do lol
But your thread is exactly that! A massively helpful post, with the condensed knowledge of experienced and thoughtful people, which I can confirm from personal experience.
Thanks for this gift and will make sure to absorb it and live by it. Not because I like your words, but because they are the truth.
Thank you again. ;D
sure thinking about sex is wired to our brains. Just as jerking off to is WIRED to my brain. Should I wait 100000 years for my genes to adjust?
Just for your knowledge: EVERYTHING you WIRE to your brain is wired to your brain.....
And while we're at that Sherlock..... Explain to me what's the use of THINKING about sex?
so what if thinking about sex is wired into our brains?
Killing others is also wired into our brains, so is having sex with as many people as possible and eating as much as we can...
control your urges/stuff that's "wired into your brain" be awesome
or dont control them and suffer and blame others
you have a choice in the matter, no matter what's "wired"
This is very helpful thank you!
I find this quite saddening to read. Here's me on almost 90 days... but what I've achieved is basically nothing. I mean it's hard to find life goals with fatigue and motivation problems. I mean would getting a girlfriends, spending time with her not be all that's needed to rewire?
EDIT: Ok so If i try and focus on doing well in the gym would that help? Revising for exams. I'm currently doing a lot of pelvic floor exercises.
I'm having a problem with my eyes as you can see the physical damage porn has done to me. It's affecting my subconscious hardcore and can't get over it. It's like I'm the only one with the crack eyes and the shame is real.
Great post. Will help the people who struggle.
However. In my opinion abstinence was the single greatest thing I done during this reboot.
I suffered severe anxiety and dead dick all my life.
Early on in the reboot i approached a new method of healing. I tried masturbating again to "kickstart" the libido. I read this somewhere and while it may help some. In my case it slowed me down. Didn't help with anything. Severe cases like me cannot take this approach. Abstaining for long periods of time (9-15 months) is essential.
Ive gone months without a relapse i don't plan on masturbating again. Only sex.
I would love to see a thread or a new part of a website opened for long term rebooters. It could discuss the best options and the worse things you can do.
Same here with the abstinence. I can't masturbate at all because I look more and more cracked out every time I do it. Only noticing healing by abstaining. Wet dreams even set me back. Had 3 in one week a couple weeks ago and felt like killing myself, set me back like a full blown relapse.
Wet dreams used to kill me. Once i stopped caring about them it got better. I had a wet dream yesterday. Had a lil bit of anxiety (stutter etc). But today I can speak perfectly and with confident.
Borges but it this way wet dreams help you ... its helping your refactor period and its preparing you for real orgasms. Eventually you'll be back to yourself after a WD in a day or two.
Stop thinking about your eyes your in a habit of worrying.. My eyes have small cracks, not as severe as you but if i focus on flaws its gonna fuck me up.
Keep doing what your doing don't think just DO.
no offense but can't any one of you just extremely summarize this thread and make some key rules and key actions that should be taken?
porn pmo relapse reboot flatline mindset wet dream pied I'm sick of this bullshit, maybe only death make me pmo-free
hopefully someone summarizes this thread, at least I can bring my self to read something
Just read the first post on the first page. The key rules and key action are written in bold and big fonts.
Seriously, if you can't read a single thread and are so lazy/self-centered that you think people have nothing else to do than summarise it for you, you'll relapse and relapse again, failing miserably. This is exactly the mindset you have to change if you want to leave porn out of your life. I don't want to be rude - see this not only as a way of learning how to reboot, but also as the first step being part of your reboot process.
I've read that post, too much true information that I can't store
I can't just reboot anytime I want, only few rare times after certain relapses I get a very rare good opportunity in which my mind and powers work WITH me to abstain for some weeks, relapse again and I will lose that mindset which helps abstain, months pass and that opportunity comes again and so....
I've read enough website to get me confused and made alot of actions such as making a journal, doing a habit replacement, etc Still got nowhere!
Bro only death can beat pmo, period
"Reboot" is NOT A BUTTON I can press whenever I desire to! How come so many of you reboot 24/7 ?!?
Rebooting is hard. I know nothing about how deep you are into PMO, but plenty of people relapse many many times before they make it.
What makes the difference is to keep trying, to get back on track after each relapse. To learn from your relapses.
And do take responsibility for yourself - that includes not asking people to do your job for you. I'm not saying it's easy, but it's the way to go.
Did you control the days that you had wet dreams?
How many days was the biggest interval without any wet dream?
I think I am having too much wet dreams.
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