My Story

Discussion in 'Ages 30-39' started by dreich, Dec 6, 2016.

  1. dreich

    dreich New Member

    Hi guys. I'm new to this forum but I follow the porn recovery and no fap topic for several years now. I tried to recover myself but without significant success. Max period without P and M was about 10 days. My personal life is quite sad. I'm 35 but I haven't had any relationships with girls and women including sexual ones.
    I started to M when I was 13-14 years old. And from that time I had been MO-ing once or twice a day with my fantasies or pics. At the age of 25 I was introduced to the broadband internet and from that time I became obsessed with P sites and my interests have become weird like TS etc. :eek:
    I understand that I use P and M when I'm stressed or bored, so I need to find alternative ways of stress relieve and stress management and to use my free time more wisely, so I don't endup sitting in front of my computer alone at night time. My primary goal is to avoid PMO, letting myself MO sometimes, but I understand that M should not be an option too, so I need to find someone special who will help me to fight it as well. :)
    So that's all for the first post. I think this forum is very helpfull and lets us share our thoughts and knowledge. Together we'll do the impossible.
    BTW sorry for my English. I'm not a native speaker. ;)
     
  2. ItsPossible

    ItsPossible Active Member

    Hello and welcome!
    You you find here that you are not alone in this. Don't get discouraged if you don't get replies to your posts. Keep posting because there are lots of lurkers that find your post useful. I was one of them but I noticed that writing down my struggles, feats, etc was helpful. I am trying to get better with conversations with others on here. Definitely go through this the absolute must read,(link below) I have read through it twice and each time I read it, I get a sense of control on my addiction. http://www.yourbrainrebalanced.com/forum/threads/absolute-must-read-threads-start-here.7767/

    Hang in there and good luck! You got this!
     
  3. dreich

    dreich New Member

    Hi ItsPossible. Thanks for your reply and the links you provided. I see that you've achieved some success, and I wish you to become better and better everyday and achieve our common ultimate goal - forget about P for life!
     
  4. dreich

    dreich New Member

    I start my journey of breaking the P addiction today because I relapsed in the morning by checking some sex chat and spending money on it (that's a huge problem of mine too) but no MO today (MO-ed 4-5 days ago). I have a P blocker software (K9) installed but it seems not effective for me, because it allows me to recover my password if I want that strongly. :(
    I'll try to follow the rule of 3 DON'Ts: Don't succumb to fantasies, Don't touch the penis (for hygiene and toilet procedures only), Don't watch P and everything related.
     
  5. staythecourse

    staythecourse Well-Known Member

    Welcome aboard dreich. We are all here to help each other. The key is you are making this effort. There will be slips and falls, but getting back up is what counts. Sounds corny, but remember if you go from PMO everyday to PMO 2-3x a month, that is a huge success!

    The next part is your mindset. It cant be Ok, I can't masturbate, I can't masturbate..yes, that will happen, but it needs to be replaced with positive behaviors. When someone quits smoking, many times they replace it with exercise. The bonus is getting in shape, something taking time/schedule and the euphoria you can get from exercise.

    I am currently, slowly getting into meditation. I am also big on studying a dating coach, Corey Wayne. I am in a running club and run a lot, go to AA meetings, and also want to try yoga by the end of the year. Biking in 2017 is a goal of mine too. A month ago, I wasn't thinking this way. But by giving up PMO now Im have time to look into dating coaches, other inspirational speakers, meditation, and other things I've been meaning to explore. Now you'll have time to as well!

    Replace the negative with a positive :)
     
  6. dreich

    dreich New Member

    staythecourse, thanks for your words, what you wrote is very true! Wish you to become a winner in this hard battle with the porn addiction! I understand that it is very rarely that we achieve our goals in life without setbacks and temporary failures, but the point is to learn from them and keep going. If we draw it, it would look like an up (success) and down (setbacks) line but if we see it in a large scale we can see that the whole trend should go up if we don't give up.

    I totaly agree that we need to replace the addiction with some useful behaviour, like excersise, reading books, self improvement. I'm trying to keep up my 3 times a week excersise in the gym. I should try meditation as well to manage my stress level, it really worth it.
     
  7. dreich

    dreich New Member

    Day 1. No fantasies, didn't watch P, didn't touch and no "news" from it (no MW as well). Trying to change my daily schedule to minimize the time that I spend in front of my home laptop. I'm not sure that counting of days without PMO is a good idea and when we relapse it gives us some stress while we reset our counters. Anyway, I'll count days for some time, and see if I'm going to continue.

    Be strong guys. Porn industry is not gonna survive! :cool:
     
  8. staythecourse

    staythecourse Well-Known Member

    Whats one thing you are going to do today that is good for you?
     
  9. dreich

    dreich New Member

    I haven’t been on this forum for a while. Things didn’t change so much. I still pmo, sometimes on a daily basis, that makes me sad and I feel lack of confidence that it is possible for me to get rid of pmo. Anyway, today was my relapse and I decided to follow a path of clean life without dirty and nasty pmo. I realize that it’s not easy and I will have to follow the rule of 3 don’ts: don’t touch, don’t watch, don’t fantasize. I’ll need to cope with my urges by being busy and other things. I hope to post here from time to time. Let’s start!
     
    occams_razor likes this.

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