My story of sadness Q_Q

Discussion in 'Ages 20-24' started by King of ED, Apr 29, 2014.

  1. iHaveSeenEvil

    iHaveSeenEvil Do it for her, the mother of my children.

    Hot damn, that weekend sounds killer.
     
  2. King of ED

    King of ED New Member

    Haha yea it was hella fun :D and i really felt like i needed it to take my mind of off my reboot and stuff!
     
  3. King of ED

    King of ED New Member

    Day 52

    I've managed to stay away from pic's with half naked girls! Horreyy <3
    Mission complete.

    Went out for a drink with a friend yesterday, noticed some girls realy checking me out, like it was back in the good old days..i kinda wanted to go talk to them..but im not ready yet to just do that openly. Maybe at day 60 i might be blue balled enough to actually do it LOL. However, it felt like a major boost in confidence to be found attractive again by the opposite sex! Next time i think i'll just go over there and..ask for the digits! #anxietyhavemercyonmepleaseee

    Anyhow..just got a random woody and insta went to the bathroom to try and jack off..2/3 pulls got me thinking like wait..wtf am i doing? Nasty story i know but the point im trying to make is that i NEVER EVER thought i'd be able to stop myself RIGHT in the middle of the act. I think EVERYONE on this forum knows how hard that is. Seems like im finally growing up :)

    Im gonna set a goal for myself tho. At day 60 till 70 i MUST go and have talks + conversations with girls. To overcome my anxiety. So i've got 8 days to prepare and then another 10 to make something happen! If any of you r following my journal, you can slap me in the face if i fall ^^

    Goodluck out there fellow rebooters, WE WILL BE VICTORIOUS!!
     
  4. King of ED

    King of ED New Member

    Day 54

    Fuck..almost relapsed..tried to MO in the shower..almost O but it didn't happen. For some reason im not able to MO. I need some sort of help..PMO is amazing but a picture is enough. Anyhow, im glad i didn't O, may have set me back a bunch, i didn't go deathgrib or warp speed either so..i guess im fine

    It's getting so hard to control myself though. I literally don't know what to do anymore to NOT think about sex..most of the P images have left my mind and now in only trying to fantasize about real sex with real girls to atleast minimize the damage done but, im so scared of PMO'ing cuz i have tons of sexual tension build up pff..

    PIED is such a great evil and it's so powerful..i rly hope someday i will be able to recover..
     
  5. King of ED

    King of ED New Member

    day 47!

    yessss i relapsed! and i relapsed HARD.. jack after jack after jack after jack..all on porn... but im very pleased with my new streak.
    so let's see..where to start on this...

    so i started getting clean 47 days ago.. went thru hell...i srsly felt like i needed it...and all the relief it brings.. but i felt like such a sad little filthy excuse for a man that i had no other choice then to stop xD..
    crazy cravings followed... but on november 10th i met the greatest girl ever! we sort of like knew eachother before since she lives closeby but we had never spend time together..so that day we did. and then all the other days of the week we did aswell ;p.. then 1 week later, we had sex.. at around day 20 of my reboot. didn't fail horribly since i was very aroused and very attracted to her. but ofc, the king can't come! after that 2 more failed sex experiences ocured. so i had to tell her what the issue was... she reacted so cool to it... "owh so it's not my fault? well i guess we'll just have to keep trying then"

    I WAS LIKE WOOOOOOOOW DAFUQ... she's staying? so after another 12 or 13 horrible, horrible sex adventures it finally happend. i busted...such a big relief and boost of confidence...like i can't even begin to explain how great it felt. i felt like a man again. we we're both so freaking happy haha. i haven't had succesfull sex in 6 years so.. think my body was like dafuq..since i got noxious and almost threw up. after that i had like 3 or 4 more failed attempts before being to explode again.. and yesterday i had another succes! right after the second time we succeeded.

    so there you have it.
    47 days clean atm - prolly bout...75% cured
    started having sex from day 20
    12/13 failed attempts before succes, 3/4 failed attempts before second succes and the third succes was right after the second

    i. fucking. made. it. God blesssssssssss
     
  6. iHaveSeenEvil

    iHaveSeenEvil Do it for her, the mother of my children.

    dude that's so fucking awesome to hear!

    I'm so happy for you!
     
  7. King of ED

    King of ED New Member

    Thanks dude :) i think i found my own lyss :D have had 3 succesfull days of sex! I kinda start to feel the feeling you had when things started working out for you..pricelesssss!!
     

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