My Journey

Discussion in 'Ages 40+' started by StarWarsFan, Jan 4, 2022.

  1. StarWarsFan

    StarWarsFan Member

    Yeah, I have a way of doing that even though it's not really been easy at all. I can say that I have not gone to the P sites, but I can't say I haven't wanted to, sometimes that want was pretty strong. Since I WFH (own my business) I've been able to get up and do something, like taking a walk, to get the urge to pass. It's still a work in progress, especially urges to MO, but it's getting better and easier to deal with. I also have a very supporting wife in this and I know not everyone does.
     
    path-forward and Saville like this.
  2. path-forward

    path-forward Active Member

    SWF. Keep it going! Your strength and journey is very inspiring to me!
    i sense the “want” will be a long term challenge for me as well. As you said, you need to push back on the triggers and resulting urges. Creating new behavior patterns.

    And it definitely helps a lot to have a supporting wife. I thanked my wife yesterday for her strong support - and mentioned some wives on the forum feel betrayed and upset and relatively unsupportive.
    she emphasized that addiction in any form needs very strong support and encouragement to beat it.
    And that one’s wife needs to understand their support is necessary to ultimately help the marriage survive and grow stronger.
    Most importantly - she is not making me feel small or weak. On the contrary - she is making me feel much more deserving of her love and attention. And that she understands my PIED will take some time to get “fully better.” She emphasized that she is not expecting a quick fix - but that I am already showing signs of great improvement.
    I’m in this journey will for the long term and feel very blessed for her support. she has been very concerned about porn’s affect on our sex life for a long time and is very happy that I am finally working hard to help both myself and our marriage.
     
    Last edited: Jul 20, 2022
    StarWarsFan likes this.
  3. path-forward

    path-forward Active Member

    Hey SWF. Just checking in. It’s been a while since you posted on your thread.
    Though I very much appreciate you acknowledging and giving feedback on my own thread.

    Hope you are doing relatively well.


    I find staying active journaling and keeping up with other brothers very helpful for me - both in regard to maintain discipline and also emotional peace of mind overall. I have come to realize I can’t do this alone and truly need the support and counsel of my brothers on the forum.

    while my wife is very supportive and nonjudgmental about my PMO addiction - I much prefer to rely more on the forum for ongoing encouragement and support - as it brings out much more masculine feelings.
     
    Last edited: Sep 23, 2022 at 12:13 PM
  4. StarWarsFan

    StarWarsFan Member

    Hey path-forward, thanks for checking up on me, appreciate that more than you know. I've been meaning to get back to journaling even if just as an outlet for my thoughts and such, even though I do come on here near daily.

    As to PMO, I've been doing alright although I have had occasions of peeking lately. Not on direct P sites, but it's P no doubt. I'm not doing anything and rarely watch for more than a few minutes, but I'm doing it and need to stop. My streak is still good in my book as I haven't combined PMO, but barely. However, my sex life continues to improve and we're finally (after 25 yrs of marriage) able to discuss it like adults.

    Other than that, life in general has been a bit stressful. Car stuff is annoying and somewhat expensive, and not easy to fix. Job search is not going as well as I would like and my current practice is seeing a bigger decline in new work coming in than ever. So, lots of stuff that would see me doing PMO to cope with it. Luckily, I'm not using P. I have gone to a couple concerts and trying to get back into a couple of hobbies. Strength training for my sport is going alright, seems to be moving in the right direction, so that's good. Not as much as I would like but what can you do.
     
    Mozenjo and path-forward like this.
  5. path-forward

    path-forward Active Member

    SWF - you’re very welcome and glad to hear you’re in a good place with your wife. And kudos to you for staying strong in dealing with life’s speed bumps. Tho sorry you need to deal with them.

    Overall - you are doing great! Very happy for you!

    Just try to keep stepping farther and farther from the P subs. It was my downfall 2 weeks ago - and I learned a valuable lesson. You need to starve the addiction. Any morsels of food just increases the urges.

    keep up the fight!
     
    Mozenjo likes this.
  6. Mozenjo

    Mozenjo Well-Known Member

    SWF, sounds like you are indeed doing well. path-forward is right, though. We can't give the addiction anything to latch onto, or it will do just that.
    Keep going!
     
    StarWarsFan likes this.
  7. badger

    badger Well-Known Member

    while i stay away from pmo, my addiction is doing push-ups in silence. it is getting stronger. waiting for me to challenge it. if i don't want to keep getting my ass kicked, i stay out of the ring with the gorilla.
     

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