I want to put this out there for others to see because I think it could be helpful, and it would be nice to get all this off my chest. I started masturbating with porn when I was 12. I was a daily masturbator, sometimes more for a while, and by the time I was in middle school there were some days where I would pump out 3 or 4 sessions. I remember several times in my life where I became raw. I'm sure that bullying and social anxiety had something to do with me developing such a strong addiction here. I managed to find some real tangible happiness back in high school and I have been able to retain that through my college years, but I never have had a physical relationship with a girl. I'm sure the longer that went on, the worse this made my problem. I'm at the point where I'd be scared to have sex for fear I couldn't get fully erect and that I'd orgasm instantly. I don't even want to think about trying that until my spontaneous erections come back, as to me that's the only way to be sure I'm OK short of masturbating. As of right now I have seen very small progress, but the urges are still really strong. I've become someone who is oversexed. I feel obsessed with sex often times, and I just want to bang every girl that is even remotely attractive. It really weighs on me. It makes me feel like a piece of shit. All in all, I've made a lot of progress in overcoming depression, learning to navigate the social world, and learning to have a healthy relationship with women, but I still have this one last hurdle to overcome and it's really been rough. I have put myself in this position and no one can help me but me. For the first time in a while this whole issue is pushing me back towards the sadness I used to feel, and it makes me feel really alone. There's hope in all of this, but I think this is the hardest thing I've had to deal with in my life. I apologized for this extremely emotional outpouring. I just felt like I needed to vent. So far I've made it a week without orgasm, and 5 days with no porn or masturbation. Here's hoping to beating this habit once and for all! The urges are strong but I will be stronger.