my journal day one

Discussion in 'Ages 40+' started by pizzaman, Jun 6, 2012.

  1. pizzaman

    pizzaman New Member

    39 and the day is fine.
    this is the longest I've gone without looking at porn!

    tomorrow will be doing some recovery work.
    also juts looking forward to another day where I can fill it with fun things to do.
    i'm glad to be alive and sober.

  2. pizzaman

    pizzaman New Member

    40 days sober.

    anyone have a sports star who wore number 40?

    Awww, it doesn't matter. what matters is I lived another day porn free and reaped the rewards.
    Clear-headed and able to be a part of the world around me.

    Good luck to all those out there working hard to stay clean.
  3. Pilgrim

    Pilgrim New Member

    Congs, Pizza!

    Keep walking.

    It is for yourself!
  4. penguinmaster

    penguinmaster New Member

    I know we keep track of days here and that's probably a good idea so I don't 100% agree with SAA, but they always say "I'm grateful for another 24 hours." Maybe we can have the best of both worlds here, congratulations :)
  5. pizzaman

    pizzaman New Member

    thanks Penguin and pilgrim.

    41 days.
    super happy to be sober.
    Just going along each day gradually getting better. My brain is healing. I can almost feel it happening. :)

  6. Lysander

    Lysander Member

    Man you are a inspiration.
  7. pizzaman

    pizzaman New Member

    Thanks Lysander!

    42 days and you know what that means---
    Jackie Robinson day----number 42 for the brooklyn dodgers.
    that guy could really fly around the bases.

    Feeling good. Need some rest, a good night's sleep and I'll be rar'in to go tomorrow.

  8. pizzaman

    pizzaman New Member

    43 today.
    nice work Me!

    So feeling a little bored today. Needed to really remind myself to occupy my mind with healthy things. Ended up playing with my camcorder, made a short video.

    Being bored can lead me down some inappropriate paths so I need to keep an eye out for those times and redirect myself to something fun and meaningful.

  9. Pilgrim

    Pilgrim New Member

    Hi, Pizza!
    You are doing very well, man.
    Concentrate and keep vigilant.

    good luck
  10. penguinmaster

    penguinmaster New Member

    Strong work, keep it up! :D
  11. pizzaman

    pizzaman New Member

    Thanks guys.
    Pilgrim and Penguin. very helpful!

    44 days today. Mr. October's number--reggie jackson.
    Glad, so glad to be sober.
    wonderful to be living a life closer to the one I want instead of always feeling like it's slipping through my fingers.
    Today I had less boredom and less cravings. All around it was a good day.

  12. Moggio

    Moggio New Member

    Pizza I just had a read through this thread and have to admire how good you're doing. Keep it up!
  13. pizzaman

    pizzaman New Member

    Thanks Moggio-

    day 45 and still alive and kicking.
    Feeling good today. some fantasizing but keeping busy with my drawing and playing around with my video camera.


  14. pizzaman

    pizzaman New Member

    day 46 and the recovery train rolls on.
    I'm feeling good, tired but good.
    Never let up on this recovery thing, I say to myself and to anyone who might be reading.
    It's a struggle at times and at other times it's wonderful, the new found energy and optimism.
    I can feel my molecules healing one by one.

    It's a gift to be here recovering like this and being able to share it with others.

  15. pizzaman

    pizzaman New Member

    Sober day 47.
    apparently the number 47 is significant to certain episodes of star Trek.
    Just looked that up.
    Also it's the 15th prime number.

    and it's the longest I've stayed sober, though not without effort.
    Having some cravings, urges tonight so it's all the more important to remind myself that sobriety is a gift and to not take it for granted.
    I remembered numerous times today that were it not for my sobriety I wouldn't have been able to laugh, and enjoy the great day that I had.
    Here's to staying sober.

  16. Lysander

    Lysander Member

    Thank you for staying sober
  17. rcfergie5

    rcfergie5 Guest

    To staying sober, my friend.
  18. pizzaman

    pizzaman New Member

    Thanks guys.

    Lysander, I'm grateful that my staying sober can help you in some way. That means a lot and in some ways that is what keeps me going although I know ultimately I need to do this for myself or it'll never take hold.

    So day 48 sober. Going along things are good but still not without the fantasizing and occasional urges.
    Sundays are usually good days for my recovery b/c I go to an SLAA mtg every sunday night.
    I also met with my SLAA sponsor who is sober and has been for two years. Boy if I could get to that point I'd be one happy hombre.

    Well, here's to keeping on the gentle and steady path to recovery.

  19. Lysander

    Lysander Member

    Pizzaman, I'm learning this journey is... Interesting. I feel like my back is to the 2d life and that I'm running towards a real mate that I can hold in my arms... I dont remember this feeling before, but I need to watch for bumps and holes in the road. As I go day by day different feelings are happening inside like happiness, sadness, boredom and feeling grateful for another day. It's been really interesting ups and downs. The fact that you keep going on your journey is inspiring to me, you are helping to lead the way.
  20. penguinmaster

    penguinmaster New Member

    That's definitely true - live long and prosper! (wrong series, I know ;))
    And congrats on your accomplishment, every day makes us a little stronger...

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