Large chunks of time between postings. Not a recipe for success... I was at a BevMo type place last week and was impressed with a woman who was shopping there. Seemed like whatever aisle I went to, she was there. But, not wanting to read anything into that and definitely not come across as if I was following her, I didn't jump to any conclusions. Then, as I chose a checkout line, she came over and filed in behind me. Now, this woman was probably 15 to 20 years younger than me. So what's a dirty old man like me supposed to do with this situation? Well, I made some quick small talk, joking that I felt silly for ending up with a single bottle of beer for my efforts (they didn't have what I was looking for). She said something I didn't quite catch, but it almost sounded like, "well, you could always get two". Argh. Was this an opportunity? Probably. Did I pass on it for fear of being rejected? Yes. I bring this up because it reminded me of how many women there are out there, and that my addiction is continuing its stranglehold on my life by giving me an excuse to just keep letting chances for escape pass me by. There is still only one way to lose the habit, and that is by not acting out. My confidence will grow once I give myself the gift of saying no when it's the most difficult. I was going to surf around tonight, even if only at some pre-porn. I won't do that tonight. Another reason for logging on tonight was a text I got from a friend who went on a date last night as a direct result of throwing caution to the wind and asking someone out after meeting in a similar situation to the one I just described. Granted, the opportunity was maybe more user-friendly in his case, but still. He made the move, and was rewarded for it. OK, that's it for now. Will try to log on here more. The habit isn't going to quit itself. I need to make it happen.