Moving Forward

Discussion in 'Ages 25-29' started by Ospek, Oct 22, 2013.

  1. Ospek

    Ospek Member

    Being cheated on can be a pretty traumatic experience, and from what I understand, such experiences can drive a person into sex or porn addiction. I had a pretty depressing experience with a girl at a young age and I used porn as a a coping mechanism. I believe that is when the addiction took hold. Porn has a funny way to dull the pain.

     
  2. Ospek

    Ospek Member

    When Tension Builds Up

    It always happens like this. When I begin to get frustrated on a project, that is when the urges hit.

    I have created new habits, behaviors that I have done like 4 weeks straight. I exercise and take cold showers daily. I eat right; no fast foods. I have a steady sleeping schedule; its not an optimal schedule but I'm gradually getting there. I read everyday. I avoid the internet for the first half of the day - sometimes for the whole day. But I haven't shaken off porn.

    I am currently struggling on my senior project. It was smooth sailing when I was doing research and sketches but once it's time to create I'm done, my brain does not want to cooperate anymore. I'm actually craving some alcohol and cigarettes right now. Alcohol numbs me and cigarettes have this calming effect that helps me take a "break" from everything and see things from a different perspective.
     
  3. It's difficult to shake off porn but from what we are doing, we are already on that path. What we have to remind ourselves is we stopped the downward spiral of failure and we turned it around to an upward spiral of success. Even if we hit a few bumps on the road like your school project, we are still in the upward spiral. Remember that because one small setback is not a problem at all. Alcohol and cigarette re-use might become a problem for you because then, you might reverse your upward spiral so be a little bit on your guard if you do decide to use them again. ;)
     
  4. Joseph87

    Joseph87 Guest

    I am by no means am an expert presenter, however, I feel that I've come a good ways from where I once was. With that said, I do not enjoy the undivided attention at all. But when I'm in the moment, I pretty much make myself believe that I do enjoy it. I can't be bored with the presentation or else my attention span will begin to waiver, which can lead to lingering self-consciousness thoughts. That's when things get dangerous and my mind can start to play tricks on my confidence.

    I try to go in with the mindset that I must demand respect from the audience. It's my job to be articulate, convey a clear, concise message or idea, and grasp the attention of the audience in doing so. Personally, I like to achieve this through an authoritative presentation-style. I make myself look like I know what I'm talking about, even if there are weak areas that I'm not so well-versed in. I want the audience to know that I'm the residential expert and have the know-how on the subject matter. I speak up, become a commanding presence, control the flow of conversation, and though I'm fairly monotone, I try to display enthusiasm with my speech (even if it's not sustained, but just in a short burst or in a few key moments) as if I have a vested interest in what I'm talking about.

    When I've practiced this style enough, I suppose it starts to come more naturally. That's why I say it feels good to be in my own skin when all eyes are on me. I've essentially created a "skin" that I am comfortable to reside in when dealing with the given scenario. Afterwards, I normally go through a shedding phase :D. I guess that's how I'd best explain it.

    Good luck on your project! Where there's a will, there's a way.
     
  5. Rowa

    Rowa Guest

    Hey haven't heard from you in a while hope everything is okay. Keep on fighting Ospek
     
  6. Hey Ospek, how are you doing? I miss reading updates from your journal brother :D
     
  7. Ospek

    Ospek Member

    I am going to start writing here again. I basically gave up. Not directly, but I have had the mentality of, "I will postpone it and start later."

    I haven't been depressed but I am in a funk. Maybe I am depressed, it's just not a "sad" depressed but a "I don't really care about anything (about life)" depressed. I currently do not see the "fun" in life. I'm mostly serious, shut-down, and very irritable. People annoy me. Everyone, even people I like. After of being around them for too long, I begin to get annoyed by them, by things they do. It's nothing personal. I still appreciate them but I also appreciate my alone time, away from everybody.

    I think if I write here again, the goal of self-improvement will be at the forefront of my thoughts and I could work on shifting my perception to get the most out of life because time's a wastin'.

    I went to a "social event" last night and it really bugged me that there were so many beautiful women. It bugged me that I didn't have one, that I couldn't get one, and that I wasn't getting "attention" from them. Going to "social gatherings" is a triggering situation for me. When I got home, I took care of the "frustration" the only way I know how.
     
  8. stun90

    stun90 New Member

    Gotta get you out of this funk dude. Let us know how we can support you
     
  9. Hey Ospek welcome back! It's good that you are on the path to success and that you are willing to change to improve yourself.
    This journey is tougher than we thought, no? ;D
     
  10. Joseph87

    Joseph87 Guest

    Hey, Ospek. I thought I saw a recent post of yours and meant to reply.

    I hope you're doing well and still searching for whatever it is that can help pull you through towards a balanced and happy life. Take care, man.
     
  11. Ospek

    Ospek Member

    Thanks, Joseph87.

    I did post something but it was negative so I deleted it. I'm still struggling with this habit but not giving up the fight. Life is too good to be taken by this.
     

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