Lingering Sexual Confusion

Discussion in 'Pornography Addiction' started by reasonstobecheerful, Apr 12, 2012.

  1. reasonstobecheerful

    reasonstobecheerful New Member

    Hi everyone

    I'm on day 79 of no PM. Had 5 or 6 wet dreams.
    Before I found YourBrainOnPorn, I was pretty confused about my sexuality. I thought because I watched gay/transexual porn and chatted to guys online that I was gay or bisexual. Having read YBOP I realised that these actions were the product of desensitization. I was indulging in shocking/confusing/distressing material in order to get a rush. I realised then that I'm naturally straight. But for the last week or so, although I'm highly attracted to women, I've been wondering still whether I may be bisexual. I don't actually find guys attractive like I do girls, but I'm starting to doubt whether the neural pathways forged by watching deviant porn are actually reversible. So anyway I was wondering if anyone with any experience of this could leave their thoughts, preferably those who have gone longer than 100 days and/or who consider themselves 'recovered' or at least mostly recovered. But anyone who has similar concerns or experiences, please leave your thoughts too.


    Good luck to everyone else with the quitting!

  2. spinergy

    spinergy New Member

    You may be bisexual, but I doubt it if you don't find men attractive in real life. From what I've seen, a lot of straight male porn users get into gay/bisexual porn and/or phone sex because it's all about simulating sexual stimulation--of whatever kind. I don't think it has much relation to actual sexuality (just my opinion).

    Stated another way, there is a huge difference between PMO and sex with a real, live person. The only real commonality is the production of dopamine through sensory stimulation--the sensory stimulation, however is completely different: rapidly changing images plus manual stimulation versus the rich tapestry of sight, sound, feel, smell, taste and emotional interaction with a live person. There is far less difference between straight and gay porn -- both images of stimulation -- than there is between straight and gay sex, which are (I imagine) as different as men and women are different. If the sight, sound, feel, smell, taste and interaction with someone of the same sex is a turn on, then you're probably gay or bisexual. If they don't, even after you've used gay/bisex porn to stimulate a brain that's become used to straight porn, they you're probably not. I wouldn't worry about it.

    On another point, I'm no expert, but from what I've read there's no reason to believe that the neurological effects of porn use are irreversible.

    You're doing well.

    Keep calm and carry on.
  3. JK47

    JK47 New Member

    From what I've read I think you're mostly right, except that even after you recover your brain will always be more susceptible to that addiction (as is the case with most addictions).
  4. spinergy

    spinergy New Member

    Point taken. I was focusing on the dysfunctional effects.
  5. offthecuff

    offthecuff Guest

    Hi reasonstobechearfull, part 3 by any chance?
    anyway you are definitely not gay based on the evidence presented!
    It is so sad to see people think they have suddenly become gay based on their internet consumption. If that was the case I would be worried i had suddenly become a lesbian :-\ So of you don't like blokes in real life and you have no strong desire to snog something with a 9 oclock shadow i suspect you are just confused. But there is only one way to find out, engage with the real world!! there is nothing wrong with being gay but you have to get out in the real world and find out what you want. And enjoy it!!!!
  6. reasonstobecheerful

    reasonstobecheerful New Member

    cheers offthecuff! (and the rest of u) I'm positive I'm not gay. I was just going through a wobbly few days I think.
    and yeah, part 3 indeed! juice of a carrot, smile of a parrot!
    good luck with your reboot

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