I never thought I would be here as a thirty-three year old man. It started when I was eleven years old, and I looked up pornography on my family's computer. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I had no idea that I was setting myself up to objectify women for the next twenty-two years. I had no idea that it would contribute the decline of all of my intimate relationships. I had no idea that it would completely isolate me socially. I had no idea that I waste spend hours alone on my computer. I had no idea that I would develop dark and shameful fetishes. I had no idea that it would lead me to act-out with prostitutes. I had no idea that it would bring me to the brink of suicide. Exposing children to pornography is not unlike using an cyanide-laced ice cream cone to entice children to the back of a windowless white van, wherein lies sadistic and horrific nightmares beyond the imagination. It is an act of pure malevolence and unadulterated evil. Exposing children to pornography should be a felony that carries a minimum of ten years in prison. Current age verification is not sufficient, and the producers of pornography websites need to be held accountable. But I digress. Pornography has taken a lot from me, but most significantly porn has stolen love from me. Not all of the wishing in the world can get it back. But, right now, this very moment, this is the first moment of the rest of my life. Henceforth I choose to live a life free of pornography. I choose to live a life full of peace and freedom. Rather than wallow in self-hatred, I choose to live a life of love, kindness, and compassion for myself. I choose to find and pursue the woman of my dreams. This journal will serve to chronicle my journey over the next ninety days, and I am honored to share it with you guys.