Learning to be myself

Discussion in 'Ages 30-39' started by Thelongwayhome27, Sep 24, 2017.

  1. Shady

    Shady Well-Known Member

    @Thelongwayhome27 it's good that you didn't have any strong withdrawal symptoms. For me it was shivers and chills.

    I guess there's another element to take into consideration. It's not just the caffeine. You're used to sitting there with a cup in your hands and calmly drinking. So replacing it with a healthier drink is a good idea.

    But why do you think coffee and sexual urges are related?
    Thelongwayhome27 likes this.
  2. Thelongwayhome27

    Thelongwayhome27 Well-Known Member

    I had a general thought that one problem I have is I overanalyze things which paralyzes my capacity to take action. I over worry about things and thus postpone decision taking (and action) until I am forced to decide one way or another. Hey, I'm a pretty neurotic individual. One solution is to get in a mindset where I become less attached to whatever will happen and just practice taking action, even if it’s smaller actions, in feared directions. To not think as much and just kind of do things, without overanalyzing. When I manage to do this, from a positive mindset, things often come out well and I get a different kind of energy, or more of a flow state. Problem is that as soon as I get good or bad results I usually automatically start sliding down to my default overanalyzing and over worrying mindset. In other words if I practice detachment, even in smaller things, I soon enough fall back to the attached mindset. Another problem is also going too far with the ‘’not thinking and just doing strategy’’. Arguably, one could so something really dumb or stupid in such a state and then put himself in a difficult situation (consequences). It’s challenging to find the right level with this. But clearly being somewhat more detached with things where the consequences are not as bad as I fear (anxiety) is something to experiment with. I think in some spiritual philosophies they mention the concept of detachment. I think there could be a ''healthy detachment'' that can help in life, psychologically speaking.

    @NewStart19 - Indeed, thanks for pointing that out stopping coffee and stopping caffeine is not the same thing. I looked it up and generally speaking one standard cup of black coffee has about two times the caffeine amount that one standard cup of black tea has. I actually thought the difference was greater, I was imagining something like 1 cup of coffee being equivalent to 4 cups of black tea. This being said I still feel a clear difference to having a cup of black tea in the morning in comparison to a cup of coffee. I feel much more jolted or hyper after the latter. Since I have switched to tea, I'm also not having more caffeineited tea except the morning cup. If I have some tea in the afternoon it's tea without caffeine. If I want to go further down the path of less caffeine I can also start having green tea in the morning instead of black tea, since green tea has less caffeine. All this being said, I think I can handle coffee, as I have for years. But I think I'm going to keep going with this little experiement for some time. I do think it's helping my overall mood be more stable and, as a result, my general anxiety (including social anxiety) being more manageable. It would be cool if it would be just as easy to stop watching P lol. By the way, I have in the past gone full no caffeine for a time as well (i.e. going with only no caffeine tea for some time). I think it was more or less similar to how I feel now.

    Hopefully so. Thanks ! Just as you are as well.

    Yeah, the habit itself is definitely very pleasant ... I do miss the coffee though right now, the taste of it. But tea is all right as well.

    I think that, for me, it contributes to me having a more stable mood and less anxiety. As a result I can better handle the cravings. Or the urges are not as intense. This being said I have had strong sexual urges anyways since I stopped the coffee. But I think that coffee and that hyper mood I can get from it brings me to a place where I am more impulsive. So that was the theory... My conclusion is that it does help to a certain degree with the urges, but it's not a full proof method either. Also, it probably has a bit of an effect on general sleep quality and that probably helps as well.
    Shady and NewStart19 like this.
  3. Thelongwayhome27

    Thelongwayhome27 Well-Known Member

    Oh my God I RELAPSED !!!!! :mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad: NOOOOO...... I'm back on Cofee MoFo's :cool::cool:

    I will have to join COFEEHOLICS ANONYMOUS ! ;)
    Shady and Gil79 like this.
  4. Gil79

    Gil79 Seize the day

    Lol haha, at least you admit you have a problem. I am still in denial :D
  5. Bilbo Swaggins

    Bilbo Swaggins Well-Known Member

    Hope you’re well, man. Haven’t heard from you in a while.
    Pete McVries likes this.

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