@BoughtWithBlood - Hey, thanks for asking. 20 days without PMO / 20 days without MO Right this precise moment I'm feeling a bit un-centered and a little anxious. I think I'm probably tired because of having had to work a lot in the last few days - or better said I have managed to stay focused on my work. It feels nice to know I'm walking the right path and focusing on work, but in the same time I can feel stress building up. But this stress, I think, is part of the deal, part of normal right now. Things will also relax after a certain bump I need to go through. Until that bump, the stress is likely to increase, and I'll try my best to manage my emotions as I can. I hope that anticipating this will help. In particular today, I haven't had time to go for a run nor work out at all and I was a bit unhappy about that as I think it helps me a lot. I'm happy to be 20 days sober since my last PMO and I feel committed. I do notice an increase in background fantasies though and I am easily being triggered by just seeing a woman on television. Besides this though, I feel like at times I have been getting some nice insights. But I don't have much time to think about them now. So my recovery, right now, is being focused on the "real life" stuff. It's hard to process my emotions and also work every day. I feel that processing emotions is a good way to keep the cravings low. But the good thing is that as I'm trying to walk the right path I'm giving myself a chance to adjust to handling stress. It's just about finding the right level of flight. When I start to feel burned, I have to learn to accept I don't control everything. Then I can breathe, take a break, get some perspective, and come back. On the other hand if I explose in binge relapses I don't have a chance to practice this. Another good thing is that, although I had more relapses since January, I feel that good work from past tries is still here and I can reconnect with it. We fall, but we can get up again.