I like what you write about writing (lol?). Isn't that the time when we can be totally honest? With just a piece of paper and a pen? Why should we lie or feel any shame when we are alone with our thoughts? And the process of writing definitely helps understanding what we feel (better than "just" thinking about it). At least that's true for me. I'm glad you picked yourself up like a pro after your last relapse. Keep up the good work!