When relapses start to build up, the pit becomes almost too deep to escape. Good job for not giving up. Recovery may be slow, but this is something I don't think is possible to rush. Like you I'm not happy with my job, and I've suffered through it for many years. I've finally started to look at alternatives, because if I have to spend most of my waking time at a place which makes me depressed, I need a change. That may actually be the reason I struggle so badly these days.