Journal

Discussion in 'Ages 30-39' started by mikehunt, Oct 20, 2018.

  1. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Thanks Rudolf, same to you

    Day 5:
    ate too much today, but I'm doing pretty good overall
     
  2. Boo1001

    Boo1001 New Member

    Congratulations!! Don't worry about feeling like a new man, every day you are working on changing, you are changing.
     
    mikehunt likes this.
  3. SomethingElse

    SomethingElse New Member

    One week is a great achievement, being a better man sounds like something we should all be aspiring to everyday ‍♀️
     
    mikehunt likes this.
  4. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Thanks for the encouragement

    Day 0:
    The timing is about right, to try again. Almost the one year anniversary of my last decent streak, and there is the added motivation to finish the year strong. This time, I want to post once weekly, starting tomorrow (day 1).
     
  5. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Day 1:
    Kind of low-energy but good enough for a day 1.

    90 day goal. I'll report next week on my progress.
     
  6. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Week 1:
    That went better than normal but was ultimately a relapse of self-sabotage. Now we're into November. Year is almost over. If I can get a good 60 days in, it will feel like a great accomplishment. So that's my new goal. I want to go into 2023 feeling like a winner instead of a loser.

    I think I prefer this week in review format over the daily posting which felt like a chore. I will begin Day 1 tomorrow but I won't make a Day 1 entry. Instead, I'll update at the end of the week if successful.
     
    Thelongwayhome27 and StarWarsFan like this.
  7. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Day 0:
    the weekly posting idea didn't work. I'll try signing in every day, at least until it becomes routine.
     
  8. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Day 1:
    Too much restlessness. Frustrated. Need to exercise to work off this excess energy.
     
  9. tig

    tig Member

    Definitely a good idea to be posting everyday, especially in the first few months, having the whole support of the community behind you. Makes you more accountable and gives you added motivation to celebrate your wins, day by day by day. Keep going!
     
    mikehunt likes this.
  10. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    thanks, tig. it is motivating when the community is succeeding together, but is slightly discouraging when the community is relapsing together. I'll try to be a positive influence with this journal.

    Day 2:
    I don't think it's cravings anymore, more like a feeling of emptiness. trying to fill the void. read a self help book a number of years ago, something about a "habit loop", which was basically that. replacing the addiction with a healthy habit. I just need to push myself. exercise is a good one, and it's easy once you force yourself to start.

    forcing yourself to get off your ass is most of the battle.
     
  11. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Day 3:
    yesterday it was desire to fill the void. today I feel more fulfilled, but cravings have come back. it's actually a better feeling than yesterday. I feel more alive.
     
  12. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Day 4:
    I've done a good job battling porn addiction aspects; internet addiction could use more effort but it's not so bad compared to previous weeks.
     
  13. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Day 1:
    I remember feeling miserable on day 5. I think I should have tried listening to music or something instead of turning to PMO. Music/exercise is typically a good anti-depressant.
     
    StarWarsFan likes this.
  14. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Day 4:
    Narrowly avoided relapse these past couple days. tbh it doesn't feel like I've been taking this seriously, which is why I haven't been journaling every day. I don't want to celebrate this practice of doing the bare minimum, until I become so unsatisfied with the bare minimum that I'm forced to raise the bar.

    When I was most successful (mid/late 20s):
    -restricted not just porn, but also fantasy
    -greater restrictions on web browsing
    -read positive affirmations every morning
    -meditated every morning
    -exercised every morning
    -spare time was spent reading self-help books

    Recent years:
    -haven't restricted fantasy
    -too many excuses to browse time-wasting sites
    -haven't practiced positive affirmations in over 5 years
    -haven't meditated in months
    -I have been exercising, but not in the morning where it was most beneficial
    -haven't read a book in over a year, haven't read a self-help book in over 7 years

    It's too half-assed. I need to return to being someone who has hopes and dreams.
     
    -Luke- likes this.
  15. -Luke-

    -Luke- Well-Known Member

    Amen brother. It seems to be a pretty current theme for us guys who started highly motivated in their 20s and are now in their 30s to have been discouraged along the way.

    But you're still young and can start again. Maybe one positive habit after another.
     
    mikehunt likes this.
  16. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    true, once the exuberance of youth wears off, you feel wiser and less foolish, but also less motivated... but yes, it should be possible to recapture some of that energy.

    Day 5:
    ok, one step at a time. tomorrow, exercise. first thing in the morning.

    a strong body leads to a strong mind.
     
  17. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Day 7:
    yes, better to exercise in the morning. starts the day off with a sense of energy and accomplishment.

    I'll find something to read for the weekend. reading books is better than watching motivational youtube videos, because you avoid getting sucked into the vortex of clickbait thumbnails and "just one more video". might end up adding youtube to my blocklist, even though it does have occasional value.
     
    -Luke- likes this.
  18. mikehunt

    mikehunt Member

    Day 0:
    trying this again
     

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