Re: The cravings sneak in so subtley Thanks Amp111 I have tried CBT before (both privately and in group therapy). It has just become another source of depression for me, every time I even read the word or hear of people's successes, as it didn't work for me, or I'm just too lazy and give up too soon, I don't know. There's just no hope for me. I am a child stuck in a 34 year old man's body, living with his mum who keeps handing me spirtuality books, and now chinese architypes, and keeps on talking about her own baggage to me. These books mean nothing to me, it's just a sign of a lost, lonely human being who needs approval and love and has always expected this of me and has started seeking it in 'wisdom' books. I am tragically the same as her, but painfully aware of it. My ego is HUGE and I am angry all the time, and I have tried quitting porn thinking it would make a difference, but surprise, surprise, it hasn't. I have too many isssues, and nothing has helped. Hypnotherapy, counselling, CBT, drugs, exercise, it makes no difference. I am negative and scared of everything. No-one really understands social anxiety, even people who think they have it. They don't, they all do things, go out, have jobs, friends. They don't understand when you are from a family that has taught you to judge everything and you feel different and an outsider, and there is no social group you can find that doesn't trigger these feelings (I'm a musician, so I went to music school but felt the same alienation. I couldn't go out, get drunk, party, chat-up girls etc like everybody else was, I just became increasingly withdrawn and depressed). You go through being this shy, terrified child and teenager to a depressed adult who has to come to terms with the fact they are just negative and judgemental all the time, but all you want is an explanation and sympathetic, caring voice to understand what it was like for you and that you weren't to blame. But it is not about blame, it is about change which I have to do. It's not hell, it's purgatory since its a living death. Quit porn? It's just another excuse for not confronting what really terrifies me, but I've no idea what that is, apart from practically everything.