Journal: The path to being more awesome.

Discussion in 'Ages 25-29' started by Imbetterthanthis, Apr 8, 2012.

  1. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    For real man. And it's funny. I've been fantasizing a lot lately....but not about sex, or this chicks nice tits, or the other stuff we did. I have the image of her giving me "the look" seared into my brain. It was the look of pure submission....i had won....I knew she wanted me but I had to blast through all of her walls of resistance and i did.


    Day 15: No PMO

    Came across some bikini pics on the internet by accident. I did look briefly but was just like eh. After being with a real chick pictures just don't have that gusto.
     
  2. fullset

    fullset Member

    Day 13, 14 post was fucking awesome! Proud of you dude...I've still got a week to go before I get there...but I feel it coming ;)
     
  3. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Day 16: No PMO

    Still riding a nice little confidence high and it must show as all the girls at work are coming on to me and seeking me out to flirt. The funny thing is i've been much quieter and less energetic because i was starting to feel a little under the weather. In any case one of the girls invited me to go out with her and her friends saturday night.

    I wonder if I can crush it again like last weekend lol 8).
     
  4. forevergone

    forevergone New Member

    Keep doin what your doin brotha, we dont need porn. you only live once!!!
     
  5. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Day 17

    Oh hi there Mr. Morning Woody! Where have you have been? I see that you've returned from vacation. Woke up with a major hard on. Usually I get those in the morning when i have to take a huge piss....but this wasn't one of those.

    This whole process is fun. My first reboot was great....it lifted the fog, but this second reboot is like sharpening my senses. I see new things everyday. I don't just admire the overall sexiness of a beautiful woman but the wonderful details that make her beautiful. I admire the little things so much that I can even find beauty and charm in the plane janes of the world and would have no problem taking them to bed either.

    Everything just seems glass half full in life right now.

    Oh yeah no PMO....why should I want to....the cheap high that shit gives is no comparison to real life.
     
  6. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Day 18

    Woke up in the middle of the night with probably 80 percent hard on. Woke up in the morning no woody. Oh well. Boner health seems to be gradually coming back i guess.

    No PMO today. Was silently chuckling to myself today while at work at how much less picky i've become. I'm looking at every half decent chick thinking "yeah i'd give her a shot" as if my dick was a gift or something. Haha
     
  7. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Day 19: No PMO

    Getting a little horny....couldn't stop admiring a girl's but at work. Kept gravitating toward her to talk the entire day. So funny how magnetic women have become and me to them at times. I don't know what i'm going to say but magically shit just pops out of my mouth and boom smiles all around.

    My wit is definitely much sharper these days.
     
  8. fullset

    fullset Member

    Same thing here. I'm a few days behind you on no PMO, but its crazy how all of our lives were fairly similar before and now they are still similar but in a completely different way! Good luck with the fight!
     
  9. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Day 20:

    Wow i'm already almost halfway to my previous no PMO personal best. This is going fast. My dick is showing some signs of life, but it's not like i'm going full mast with the slightest breeze.

    The confidence and willingness to take some risks is still going strong though. I was invited to a spanish bar last night where it was likely that i would be the only white guy. I have no idea how to dance salsa or any of that stuff, but I felt compelled to try it out of sheer curiosity...and guess what? it was awesome!

    I never would have had balls to try something like this in the past. Don't get me wrong, i was nervous as hell, but I just told myself that it's all in my head. Another great weekend!
     
  10. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Day 21:

    No PMO and no urges....which is surprising because i was feeling kind of lonely and desperate for some female attention today. I haven't felt that way in a while. Usually when I would get like this a little PMO would soothe the beast. I have no desire to rub one out though....i'd just rather have a real chick with me right now. THat's something i really need to do is build a small network of female companions....i really don't want a girlfriend right now....i'd just like some cool chicks to hang around with, fool around with, and have sex with just to add some spice so my lifestyle.

    blah
     
  11. Journey

    Journey New Member

    Sounds great man, sexual magnetism at under three weeks! Though you said you've made 40 days before so that would have contributed
     
  12. Going through that now too, no desire for PMO just for actual sex. Keep it up literally.
     
  13. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Day 22 and 23

    No PMO. Nothing to report really. I was a cranky bitch this morning...that's about it.
     
  14. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Day 24 - 26 no PMO not even close, too tired and too busy.....which is great it means that i've been not dwelling on the computer.

    Went out last night, but didn't have any masculine charisma....being comfortable speaking to women at bars is not a strength of mine....I feel that clubby loungy bars are like stimulation overload and i can't concentrate. Not only that but i hate having to scream to speak to people.
     
  15. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Day 27: A little P, No MO

    Looked at some porn briefly probably like 5 minutes and it was really just eh. I did feel a massive rush of blood toward my groin and my heart rate picked up, my erection came only very slowly (i guess i just wasn't that turned on).

    Overall just apathetic lethargic mood in general yesterday. Went out last night with some friends and was just not in a social mood. The best way i can describe my mood is not depressed, not happy, just nothing at all. I saw pretty girls and was like whatever, spoke to my friends and was bored senseless about every subject. Just blah in general WTF?

    Interesting though, I did make the observation that a lot of girls were looking over to me then repositioning themselves right near me. Something about this uncaring mood gave off a vibe that was somehow not negative (maybe i just looked chilled out as fuck?). I even heard one girl walk into the bar with her friend, look in my direction, and say "stop right here, there are some cute guys." Problem was I just wasn't in the mood to interact.

    Maybe when i feel energetic and motivated again i can take on this vibe i was giving off last night and use it to my advantage to meet women?
     
  16. Journey

    Journey New Member

    Be careful with the P, five minutes can easily be enough. It's like an ex smoker, would he try one cigarette to test himself?

    That's awesome! I can relate to this for sure. If you don't care you appear very attractive.

    This is great for attracting women and I have no problem doing so when i dont care. my problem is how do you get the women when you do care? I.e how do you get a woman you actually like?

    Keep up the journal, keep up the good work
     
  17. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Yeah true that even brief periods of P can be like flipping a switch. Luckily it's over and done with no residual cravings....luckily i'm in a low libido period right now, so cravings are nil.

    Day 28 and 29

    No PMO. Boy have i been apathetic lately. Got in to work and just wanted to be left alone, didn't want to socialize, was just generally a cranky bitch. I think i'm a little burned out from work and hitting it hard at the gym. I don't feel that this is something with the PMO abstinence or anything. I did have a good woody this morning though.
     
  18. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Day 30:

    Awesome! Only 12 more days until i match my previous record. My mood was much better today. I woke up really tired and thought Oh no here we go again another lethargic day. Once I got going though, I was good. What was cool about my mood today was my focus. My attitude was like "oh look hot girl, ok back to work, let's get shit done." Felt productive.

    I haven't seen the dramatic changes that i did the first time i went this long without PMO. The sensitivity is not really there and that seemingly instantaneous boners haven't been either.
     
  19. Imbetterthanthis

    Imbetterthanthis New Member

    Day 31:

    Oh man i've been feeling weak. Had a massive boner this morning and wanted to rub one out soooo bad. I've been a little horny after flatlining on my libido for awhile. The first thing in my head since getting some mojo back is that I have this overwhelming urge to jerk it and look at pics. Luckily I've done neither. More importantly my urges cannot come to fruition because I'm leaving for a trip early tomorrow morning and will be around my buddies 24/7. Thank god!

    Bad news is that it will be a bachelor party.....so most likely there will be strippers at some point. Doh!
     
  20. John4MyLife

    John4MyLife New Member

    Your journal is really inspiring! I am so reconnecting with my own "masculine energy" and feeling "feminine energy" all through this process too. It feels so amazingly better connecting with real women and their feminine energy vs that hazy drugged feeling of PMO. As for your small steps back into P, here is a suggestion: check in with yourself when you feel a trigger moment. Really look at how you felt, what your surrounding are, your emotions, everything and really ID what the trigger was. When you ID the trigger you can create a "go to" alternative response that will pull you out of that trigger pattern. If it's being in the house alone that can trigger you, tell yourself, the next time this causes me to trigger I am dropping everything and just walking out of the house. A pre-planned response is what the military and police describe when they say "the training just took over." John.
     

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