Journal of iHaveSeenEvil -PIED cured, new girlfriend, new life.

Day 193.

Well, I did something bad and peeked a little bit last night.
Not really sure what came over me.
Either way, I'm glad to say I wasn't turned on or enthralled by anything I saw.
I looked up specific shit I liked too. Oops >.<
It had zero effect on me, and I'm really happy about it.
Probably a mixture of guilt and anxiety that made me not like it, but either way, I did not find it enjoyable.
It's different from every other time, cause I must admit I did enjoy the brief rush from previous times.
Can't say I'm not slightly disappointed in myself, but things have been going so well lately there is no way I'm gonna let this bring me down.

Lyss and I have been doing phenomenal.
I've probably had sex 20+ times since I've last journaled, all with zero erection issues.
Social life is going well.

Oh, AND I have a new job that I'll be starting up as a Therapeutic Support Staff.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't extremely nervous, but I'm also really excited.
Finally landed a job relevant to my psychology degree, and I'll be making more money with full time benefits, AND I'll actually be doing something extremely rewarding.
AND it's extremely good work experience!

 

Doc Evil doesn't have a success story, he is one.

 

Day 195.

My erections seem to be averaging at 110% during sex.

 

Great news man. Sounds like your ED is completely gone by a long shot.

 

Day 198.

Came six times in the past 24 hours from a mix of blowjobs and tit-fucking.

It's also the first heavy snow of the year which is exciting.
Been spending all of it with Lyss.
It's very nice.
We made a bunch of pillows today from some groovy fabric.
Other than that everything is well!

 

Hey Doc, been a long while! Sounds like your doing really well and I'm so happy for you and your relationship with Lyss! Hope the new job is killer too man. I see you haven't posted on here in a while and I guess you don't need to, but I just posted to wish you all the best man.

Peace
Jeffster

 

I can actually feel your happiness reading this post. Hope you're doing well. Definitely one of the most uplifting posts on this site. Can't wait to cure my own PIED too

 

Totally agree with you @Jack91. I recovered from ED and was having amazing sex, didn't look at any P at all for months and months, and as soon as I started wanking occasionally, it quickly escalated to peeking. Never actual full-on hardcore video relapses but my brain rationalised peeking at pictures and youtube videos.

Back on it now and no that no masturbation is kinda key. But also know that it's kind of key not to get too hung about it. All's well in balance I guess.

 

hey man this is my story

mind my grammar i have dyslexia !!!!

Hey man Just wanted to make a post on this subject. Basically, I've been porn free for about over 3 months...... I'm so confused whether to fap or not.

What confuses me that when i had sex for the first time it was ok and I was a porn addict for 14 years and I finally decided to quit... When I bring the girls back, I do kiss them and stuff and i get an erection and but i'm scared if it happens again that I will lose my erection again..
recently i'v been talking to girls ... by sex texting and get an erection..

i always get a good erection when kissing, sex texting with real girls and thinking about them..the only issue i had was with my ex frequently i used to lose erections with her this was 3 years ago.

i'm so confused.. is sex texting bad with real girls or not. i've been free of porn for about 3 months
need advice and help from anyone please reply!!!!
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awesome journal. so motivating

 

Did you get wet dreams? When?

 

Nope, never got them.
Not sure why.
I answered your question with much more detail at the bottom of http://www.yourbrainrebalanced.com/index.php?topic=28828.25. - you should check it out!

 

A wonderful and inspiring story. One of my favorite on site.
Why dont you post anymore?

 

Easily the best recovery story on this forum. I'm as cynical as you can get, but this gives me hope that maybe one day I may be cured, and will finally escape this fucking hell of an affliction. I re-read this every couple of months to remind myself to not lose track.

 

Re: Journal of iHaveSeenEvil - start of 90 days

Yeah man I don't even have 1 girl to talk to.

 

This..

 

Ihaveseenevil you are so motivating to read read a short glimpse of your journey somewhere is succes stories. So what is ed actually? When I was reading your succes story I got an erection when you just described all the breif account of you having sex. So do I have a sex. Previously I used to get erect seeing any hot women. But now that doesn't happen. I'm just 20 and I have started to go bald. And I feel genuinely tired all the time. I have a flaccid pennis of just under 2 inches. I get hard pennis of just 4 inches in morning wood. My semen is thin and 20 days back when I pMo when I did for the 3 Rd time it was dry. I m facing insomnia currently, lines of fingertips and skin coming out of my palms. My neck also pains aksing side abdomen and back when I work a little.