Day ??? Once again I find myself in a state where I can physically feel my brain completely drained out of its "happy juices" and asking for the only thing that could fire it up again: PMO. I'm not sad, just bored to my mind. This is often a relapsing point for me, when the world becomes black and white and my lizard brain starts pushing me towards PMO as an escape from the overwhelming boredom. I should probably leave the house but honestly, there's nothing to do outside either. I haven't checked the forum in over a month, so there's some news. The good news is that I finally went through with my plan of seeking professional help. I'm taking medication again, though it's still too soon to start feeling the benefits from it. I'm not having any bad side-effects either, which is great. Supposedly I'll start feeling better within the next two or three weeks. I also want to start a language course to push me into leaving the house at least once a week. It'll be good to learn something new as well. The not so good news is that my escort related habits have escalated to unusual heights. Nothing too insane but I definetely broke my "once a month rule". My libido's been pretty high lately after a very long flatline, and since I'm still way too antisocial to find a partner I ended up seeking escorts instead, as usual. To be perfectly honest though the only thing that makes me feel bad about it is the immense hole in my wallet. I could be saving up for travelling or whataver, but I keep sinking money into sex with strangers. Still, I won't pretend I regret ever going down that road because I don't (the exception being the two or three bad or just plain awful experiences I've had, and the ones where I couldn't perform becaue of PIED). As always, however, I'm not trying to advocate for the use of escorts. I think that's it for now. I opened the forum to distract myself from the cravings... Should probably turn my PC off for now, lol. I hope everyone is doing well. Have a good week, guys.