Jebus journal

Discussion in 'Ages 40+' started by jebu, Mar 21, 2013.

  1. jebu

    jebu Member

    A long time since i posted. Just want to let you know that I am still active and trying to help out now and then. Good things have happened to me the last year and I feel happy a lot of the time. I still credit this forum and your support for helping to turn my life around.
    Saville and Billy B. like this.
  2. A New Man

    A New Man White Knuckle Brigade 2013

    This is GOLD. I love your can-do attitude Jebu. Thanks for bumping your journal!
  3. Saville

    Saville Well-Known Member

    Wow, there is such value in reading/rereading older journals. The wisdom of Jebu is timeless. Thanks for coming back, bro, and posting.
  4. Gone fishing

    Gone fishing Active Member

    Good to see you here jebu
  5. jebu

    jebu Member

    Its been about 10 months since I last posted something in my Journal. I have been visiting the forum but I have not been very supportive with posting.

    Some of you might wonder how I am doing? Well, 2017 for the most part had a lot of stress I would rather had been without. But also, it brought some welcome changes to my life. There are fewer opportunities for me to PMO than before and I can not honestly say that the stress did not make me fall back to seeking a quick dopamine release through old and bad habits. But the good news is that a lot of dopamine also came from healthy, social and normal activity as well. So I have not been all bad. But not all good either. Understandably I have mixed feelings about this. I realize that rebalancing my brain is still a work in progress.

    I saw that the forum has a new counter and I have started using that in my profile. I have also fixed the "Jebus Journal" link in my signature. As some of you have commented, there is a lot of wisdom written down in my journal both by myself and others. I will re-read my journal to keep those thoughts fresh in mind and keep myself motivated to make life better for myself and those around me. If you feel like it, go click on "Jebus Journal" in my signature.

    This forum and those posting here deserves credit for my success in improving my life substancially. Thanks.
    40New30 and Boxer17 like this.
  6. 40New30

    40New30 Keep going

    It's easy to fall back, we're all works in progress. Welcome back.
  7. jebu

    jebu Member

    Girfriend got sick and hospitalized (shes better now) and I relapsed. Guess I wanted some dopamine.
    Reset my counter.
    Did not really enjoy the porn or the masturbation that much.
    I just used some of the old ingrown neural paths in my brain to get to the domanine.
    Now I am back on track but not feeling good, the weather is cold and bad and work is stressing me.
    Have to reduce my calory intake as well as I am gaining weight. Slightly overweight now and that is not good for my health. And I find eating less and more healthy is stressing me.
    Also need to work out more and I am looking forward to that. But finding time for workouts when I have a lot of other things to do is stressing me.
    Could use some encouragement and cheering up.
  8. Boxer17

    Boxer17 Active Member

    Hey Jebu. Getting knocked down IS discouraging. Sometimes one feels like just laying there. But we get up and on with life.
    Keep going Jebu!
    Doofus likes this.
  9. Saville

    Saville Well-Known Member

    What Boxer said. And, you have a lot of "I need to's" which imo is defeating in and of itself. We accept ourselves for who and what we are, because at any given moment that's all we have. There's nothing wrong with wanting to lose a bit of weight (I certainly want to), but girth size has little to do with PMO.

    Try posting more if you can; it makes a world of difference.
  10. jebu

    jebu Member

    Thank you Boxer. Getting on with life is really the best option.
  11. jebu

    jebu Member

    Thanks Saville. As you say I will have to accept me as I am right now and make the best of it. Stop saying "need to" and just doing the stuff that I have known for a long time that is good for me.

    I am pretty sure that I have been eating both fatty an calory-rich food to get a dopamine response when I felt I needed it. So in my case, I think I probably have been trying to compensate from not PMOing with finding other dopamine-inducing activities. So I believe there is a relation between girth size and PMO in my case. Having less dopamine released into my bloodstream in daily life is what I really fear. The logic brain is telling me that I will in time be fine but my feeling chemistry is definately not agreeing with that logical conclusion.

    Thanks for the tip to try and post more. I will try that.
    Boxer17 and Saville like this.
  12. forlorn

    forlorn Well-Known Member

    We all have the same amount of time, if it's important enough, you will find a way. You could get up slightly earlier every day and go for a walk/bike ride. To begin with commit to something small, just 5-10 minutes per day and build up from there. The solution is to make workouts a part of your lifestyle. After you've done it a few times you'll start to get a dopamine rush from the exercise itself. When it comes to working out, many of us feel put off at the thought of the pain and time it will take up. But if you think about it, the other consequences of working out have more benefits (you will feel better about yourself, you will look better, you'll have a healthier body). And if you exercise regularly you will feel less guilty about eating calorie rich food.
  13. Boxer17

    Boxer17 Active Member

    I agree. I also find it hard to set aside time for exercise so I try this approach. Sometimes we can incorporate physical activity into our day. Walking somewhere close instead of driving. Taking the stairs etc.

    Killing two birds with one stone
    Libertad likes this.
  14. jebu

    jebu Member

    Giving another go at no porn, no masturbation. My girlfriend wants my orgasms so I will not have them for myself. ;-)
    Boxer17 likes this.
  15. Clovis6

    Clovis6 Active Member

    Hi Jebu, great quote there.

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