It's Been Over 3 Years And Things Are SO Different

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by RebornAgain, Jan 20, 2018.

  1. RebornAgain

    RebornAgain Beating my addiction one day at a time.. Staff Member

    Around the 1 year mark, I wrote a success story post. I came into this as a 26 year old virgin who has never slept with a girl.

    I had successful sex for the first time around the 6 month clean mark. But orgasms messed up my sleep. They gave me headaches. They made me irritable. I had a long way to go in recovery.

    Around the 1 year mark, I was dating multiple women and in the dating game for the first time since I was 19 years old. I was sleeping with all of them, which made me feel really good.

    Then out of nowhere, I started having erection problems again. The sleep problems came back. I had ED and couldn't get hard for anything. Pictures, video, porn, real hot women. Nothing. I freaked out. For the next year and a half, I struggled on and off with erections.

    Sometimes it was awesome. Sometimes I couldn't get hard to save my life! And this was with only ONE slip up. Which was seeing an escort in May of 2017.

    Around the time I started experiencing erection problems during my reboot, I met a wonderful woman who became my wife in September of 2017! She's stuck by me through the hard times. When I was irritable and when my penis wouldn't work.

    For the last 3 months, I've ramped up my orgasms through sex to push re-wiring to a new level. 4-6 orgasms in a 2 week period and then take a couple weeks off.

    My erections are improving even more! My loads are huge! I'm no longer getting headaches from orgasms and the effects are minimal. Sometimes when I O too often, I run into sleep issues. But things are moving in the right direction.


    The point is this stuff takes time. Abstain for awhile. Then rewire rewire rewire. There's no healing without rewiring. We have to rewire our brains to regular sex so our pleasure systems see sex with a real live female as the reward.

    Keep the faith, stay clean, and rewire!
  2. RebornAgain

    RebornAgain Beating my addiction one day at a time.. Staff Member

    I’m so calm in social situations as long as I don’t over orgasm. I’ve never been this comfortable around people. Life is good and life is fun!

    I don’t think anxiety and energy levels are in a vacuum just porn related for me though.

    I’ve taken nutrition seriously and completely changed my diet. More veggies and fruits. Less GMO Foods. More healthy fats like olive oil and coconut oil.

    Veggie and fruit juicing. So I’m sure that’s played a factor. But if you met me now vs. 3 years ago, I’m a completely different person!

    Keep the faith. Rewire rewire rewire.

    I was a virgin until I was 26.
    benjamin027 and 40New30 like this.
  3. xburnerphonex

    xburnerphonex Member

    Your success story is just what I needed - good to hear you're back on track, RebornAgain. In a similar boat as you - clean of MO over 12 months, no PMO for over 15 months, but struggling to get any consistent rewiring done.
  4. libo95

    libo95 New Member

    Is it that bad to see an escort?
    Is our brain that sensitive that it can know the difference between an escort and a girl you’re dating?
    I’m not sure if your post is motivating or discouraging. Made me feel that I have a lot ahead of me and I’m not even sure if I’ll ever get anyone to rewire with.
    But I’ll keep going anyway and hope that I’ll get lucky one day.
  5. RebornAgain

    RebornAgain Beating my addiction one day at a time.. Staff Member

    For me it for me it was bad to see an escort because I was engaged and in a committed relationship.

    Seeing an escort requires a lot of visual imagery online and picking the exact girl you want to see, body type, race, etc.

    Similar to hand selecting which porn you want to watch. It’s a huge porn like un-natural dopamine rush to the brain.

    A reboot can take a long time. It’s not for the weak or faint hearted. It takes balls and guts. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to have normal penis and sexual function again.
  6. My experience has been similar in that I thought I was almost cured only to have my dick stop working again. I appreciate this post because I'm feeling somewhat hopeless after 2.5 years of this shit. Any theories why it can be so nonlinear for such a long time for some of us?
  7. RebornAgain

    RebornAgain Beating my addiction one day at a time.. Staff Member

    That’s a great question and one I wish I had the answer for. For me, I had zero wiring to actual females. All of my “sexual experiences” were through a computer screen with porn and images.

    So it’s taken my brain a long time to realize that sex is the ultimate goal with a real live female; not a computer screen.

    Keep rewiring. The more rewiring the better. Even if sex and O’s send your dick back into mini flatlines. Even if that happens, you’re showing your brain the true reward and it will learn! Pathways are very plastic.

    But it can take years of conditioning to reverse and “rewire” conditioning already in place.
    Just about given up and 40New30 like this.
  8. Yrotrt

    Yrotrt New Member

    Hi I am 25 years and virgin
    I have pied for 4 years
    Now i am in love with a girl but in my culture i should marry her so how can i rewire without a girlfriend ?
  9. 40New30

    40New30 Keep going

    So happy to read this.
  10. jack91

    jack91 Find your way throuh Staff Member

    Its nerv racking that rewiring is so important, at times its hard to find willing female to have sex with.. Its been my belief through porn days that its just impossible dream, not really even exist and didnt use time thinking of it.. (consensual energisizing sex). Now as last curse of porn usage i find it hard to rewire, there is no partners to do it with. I could live in selibathy but atm it seems pmo symptoms would just drag on. LOL! this is funny disease
  11. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Well-Known Member

    I am a 20 yr old. I started M at 14. Pmo at 16 now recently faced terrible hair loss. So Googled and found out the relation between the two. Did a reboot for over 65 days. Relapsed, reason being no erections. Also was facing terrible insomnia during this journey. Surving on anti depressants and sleeping medicines. If I don't take them I don't get sleep. I look like 30 year old. I have too much cracking of bones. My neck and lower back hurts badly. Homeopath considers it to be a mind problem. Is it mind problem or that my body has lost its energy reserves?. I simply don't feel motivated now and going through a day is a very big task. With even a little effort I get tired. Sometimes which is very rare I get sleep but I don't feel simply feel as though I had slept. How long shall it take for my sleep to become normal. I have ed, pe etc. But for me getting a good sleep is more important. Kindly pray for me and help.
  12. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Well-Known Member

    Reborn again, u need to help me in my journey. Why am I not getting sleep. How long will I have continue with insomnia?
  13. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Well-Known Member

    My concentration and understanding/ grasping ability has also gone done. Brain fog is also there. Simpler tasks like making my bed before sleep is also taking a lot of effort. I just want to get my back my original me, someone very confident a couple of years back.
  14. NotSob

    NotSob New Member

    Congrats man! Hard work paid off!!!
  15. Freedom from Servitude

    Freedom from Servitude Active Member

    Hi RebornAgain, thank you for sharing your story. I find it very inspiring. I am interested in your journey with anxiety and low energy levels, did you find that you noticed improvements in them with re-wiring, or did they just happen of their own accord by staying away from porn? I have wondered for some time whether rewiring with a partner is necessary to notice improvements for broader symptoms and not just those in relation to sexual dysfunction. I have no evidence to support this, I'm just curious.
  16. RebornAgain

    RebornAgain Beating my addiction one day at a time.. Staff Member

    @Mickeymouse are you still having sleeping issues?
    If you're still struggling with sleeping issues it could be deeper than porn.

    It could be your diet. It could be food allergies. It could be your adrenals. It could be your thyroid. I think sometimes we're too quick to blame EVERYTHING on porn! Even though porn can play a big role in the brain and brain chemistry.
  17. RebornAgain

    RebornAgain Beating my addiction one day at a time.. Staff Member

    @Freedom from Servitude that's a great question. In my opinion, the only benefits I see through re-wiring are sexual function related and sexual conditioning. I'm teaching my brain over and over what "sex" is and what "real sex" is with a live female.

    I noticed the anxiety and energy level improvements mostly through my "re-boot" and not my sexual "re-wiring" if that makes sense.

    In many cases, sex with orgasm can induce a mini set back where the anxiety will come back or my energy levels and concentration levels may fall. It's all part of the process.
    Mcgregor likes this.
  18. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Well-Known Member

    By adrenals what do you mean?
  19. ogaiao

    ogaiao New Member

    Nice to hear your story! I have been rebooting for a little more than 6 months. Definitely saw improvements, morning wood is present almost every day, erections are better. However they still fade fast without stimulation. And my refractory period is still very long.
    Stories like yours give me hope that given more time I will heal..
  20. BeInControl

    BeInControl New Member

    You can rewire with her just by talking and small touches. Rewiring doesnt mean having sex only.
  21. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Well-Known Member

    I felt i had pied. After that i read some articles which told i could more probably have sexual exhaustion. To support tge argument i no more look like a 20 yr old. I look too old of my age. Minor sprains take a huge deal of time to fade. I m on my day 47 yet i havent felt any wet dream.
  22. Mickeymouse

    Mickeymouse Well-Known Member

    Also going by your first post. I can never heal myself. As I am a Muslim and to have a girlfriend before marriage is not appropriate. Also at this point my condition is I don't get fascinated by real women not even porn( I m currently on day 95 saying this based on last relapse). So how can I even think of marrying when I am not capable of having sex.

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