Hi Its over, I agree with what you say, except that I am going for 90 days without M. My brain needs resetting.
Yeah I definitely get it. I’m currently 21 days without PMO including MO and I’ve went 96 days, 120 days in the past without PMO, but this is currently the longest I’ve went without MO. I feel like I can MO without Porn but probably want to wait longer. I really wanted to get to the 3 week mark and now that I’ve reached it I feel like I can get to 30
Hi Its over, Yes I think MO is only ok , but only if you do it without fantasy or viewing porn. And not if it tempts you back to porn. How I will cope I don't yet know.
Hi Lammit, I started this thread (see the first post). What is happening to you has happened to very many on this site. First, don't despair. It can be done (read some of the success stories) Then distinguish between a lapse (ie a brief slip) and a genuine relapse (ie hours or even days of heightened excitement search for porn. Then read a book on sex addiction. I strongly recommend Sex Addiction 101 (by Robert Weiss) which I have just read He talks there about whether MO is or is not ok, and suggests keeping off both P and M for 30+ days (most here try 90 or more rebooting) Finally, I very strongly urge you given that you are struggling to find an accountability or recovery partner. Weiss argues this is essential. I would not have got a far if I didn't correspond daily with my recovery partner. If you want to know how to get one, first post to ask if anyone (preferably around your age) would act as one. Then if you get one, click on your account, open conversation, put it the two names, with a comma between, give it a title and check the bottom box so that the conversation is locked to just you two. Then I suggest you tell each other your first names and use them in the conversation (but not on the main site)
Hi Lammit, The point of an accountability partner is this: We have all covered up and lied to our family, friends or partners. We cannot recover without total honesty,. By pairing with a partner you build up a bond of trust. You tell each other your problems, triggers and so on, and you confess your slips or lapses You discuss these together and try to work out ways of coping. And you write to each other every day. My own view is that this thing can be beaten alone, but it is much easier with a partner.
MO often leads to PMO after some time for me. Also if I MO too much I may feel lethargic. I mainly do no PMO/NoFap for mental health, I just feel more confident and less anxious for some reason. Intimate sex in a relationship however feels good. I don't think MO is a bad or sinful thing if I do it then I consider it as act of self love.
