Is the flatline really related to stopping porn?

Discussion in 'Pornography Addiction' started by BackOnTrack, Dec 18, 2013.

  1. BackOnTrack

    BackOnTrack Active Member

    So I wonder:

    Is the flatline really related to stopping porn or would someone who doesn't do PMO and just stops masturbation get it too?
     
  2. The Dude

    The Dude New Member

    I'd be really interested to know this as well.

    I've been in the flatline for about 2 weeks now. During the first 3 weeks of no PMO or MO I felt randy as all hell and ready to go. But now I sort of feel nothing. I understand this is a sign of recovery, but it's scaring the hell out of me. I started this to overcome PIED and get my libido back, but I feel like the progress has stopped, if not gone away somewhat.
     
  3. I am sad

    I am sad New Member

    Maybe this is unrelated, because my BF doesn't have ED, but since he quit porn 3 months ago, I've seen a gradual decline in his libido and interest. Flatlining? I don't know. He admits to very brief MO in the shower every week or so. Depressing, because he won't talk about any of it, and when I ask how it's going, he gets somewhat angry...He doesn't appreciate losing his sex drive. I hoped we would become closer through this, not more distant. Makes me feel unloved and unwanted all over again, like when he constantly turned to porn for hours behind a locked door. But this isn't about me.

    For your question, we now have less intimate times...lately sex once a week at best, plus another time he asks me to get him off every week. So I see the decline due to the porn being absent....for him, one way or another, he still gets off 3x a week. I continue to feel the times we have sex are to keep me semi satisfied...like it's my turn. It's hard to feel like his heart was ever in it, and even less lately.
     
  4. Dan82

    Dan82 New Member

    When I stopped watching porn I was horny for about 2 weeks.. I was getting random boners all the time... then flatline come and I had 0 libido for long long time. Now I'm out of flatline and have high libido. So yes I think that is porn related.
     
  5. Rusty

    Rusty Member

    I think patience is needed here. I think after a few more months (as long as there is no masturbation) his sex drive should rebalance an be the same as it once was.
     
  6. BackOnTrack

    BackOnTrack Active Member

    How long did it take?

    I wondered if someone who didn't watch porn in general but stopped masturbation would get a flatline aswell, but I guess no-one knows such person :D
     
  7. Dan82

    Dan82 New Member

    140 days ~ then I have MO once and was send back to flatline for 10 days...
     
  8. I am sad

    I am sad New Member

    Thanks, Rusty. It's true, I keep reminding myself to be patient. It's not so much I have to have sex, it's more about feeling desired and loved.

    Last night he said the reason for lack of sex lately between us is that he has to fight the porn urges daily, so he is forcing to keep his desire down. I assumed this is when he would be turning to me with those desires? It's all so confusing. So probably not a flatline at all.
     
  9. Aussie

    Aussie Guest

    I flatlined for 80+ days,it's very discouraging.

    For me at the time (earlier this year) I actually had people telling me I shouldn't be flatlining for this long,maybe porn addiction wasn't my issue etc.That is the last thing any of us need to hear.

    My advice to anyone going into a flatty,just surrender yourself to it bro.

    Your libido will eventually come back,it's inevitable.Its impossible to be in a flatline forever.
     
  10. Aussie

    Aussie Guest

    On my long run,it took me 8 days to enter a flatline.All it really was at that stage was a drastic reduction in libido,not a full loss of libido or urges.

    A few weeks later it was a full blown flatline,it's like being A-sexual.My dick was small (like when you swim in cold water lol) and cold,I had no erections at all,no desire at all for porn or women.

    This is pretty much why I did 94 days no orgasm,sex was just boring for me mentally and physically.

    Tell him to block out all sexual thoughts as soon as they enter your mind,it's impossible to stop thoughts popping into your head,just recognize what is happening and stop yourself from Fantasizing.I attribute this to why I went into such a deep "balls in stomach - shriveled dick,A sexual" flatline.

    Again,it can be scary.Just know that it IS normal,and just go with the flow,everyone heals.
     
  11. I am sad

    I am sad New Member

    That's very helpful to know, Aussie. Obviously I don't know what is going on in his head. When I think of flatlining, I think of no desire, no urges, no libido, but as you said, there could still be those urges. It isn't black and white.

    This is my chance to continue to work on being patient and loving and encouraging.....thanks for your help.
     
  12. Aussie

    Aussie Guest

    Your welcome.

    Your man is very lucky to have somone who is understanding and supportive.For many of us,being single and lonely is half the battle.

    "Dont have a GF,can't get a GF...fuck it,I'll fapp"

    It's a huge trigger for me,and others.

    I can't imagine what it must feel like for you,not feeling attractive to your partner etc.Its not you (I'm sure you know this,but really push this thought into your head) It's not you,the problem is the addiction.

    I'd rather masturbate over a screen than have sex with a model.Porn excites me and gets me off more,I'm wired to it,so is your man.

    I think he should go for the no gasm approach,it's hardcore - but he can do it.



    Tell him to sign up and start journaling.
     
  13. Rusty

    Rusty Member

    Its often the intimacy. I've had attractive girlfriends in the past but preferred porn, I have no idea why I was doing that but it is what it is.

    Sometimes I fantasize about other women when i'm with my partner but recently things have improved. We had really good sex last week and we had it a bunch of times in one night. It was such a break through and by the second and third times I wasnt fantasizing.

    I hope you and your partner will slowly recover the bond. It should happen if you both make an effort.
     

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