I had some urges today because of lack of sleep and some inner tension. I could really feel how I needed a release (and it felt like one of those really "legit" horny states). Luckily I was able to surf the wave. What helped was having a pretty clear "why" it's better not to do it then to do it. I'm pretty happy I may hang out with that girl soon. I hope she won't bail on me. On the other hand I am very proud of myself that I asked her. When I asked her I had this moment (right after) where I had a 200% clear conviction that this is exactly what I need to do. It's kind of hard to manage the expectations and I still see myself hoping for something sexual to happen, instead of looking at it as meeting a "friend". I'm also probably going to make mistakes (and I think I already made a minor one when I texted her again - in the way I texted her - I think I was a bit too "direct" and perhaps "cold" - but maybe this is also my inner critic, not sure.). But the important thing to remember for me is that no matter what happens this is the path for me. If I keep doing this, I will be more and more relaxed doing such things. @Pete McVries - Thanks for sharing those interesting statistics. I think that makes a lot of sense. I'm pretty sure people over value how fun/cool being single can be. I've herd at times guy friends who are in established couples say "Man if I was single today, I'd sure have a lot of fun.". Now, I'm sure it can be for some people. But it's probably a minority (as the numbers you bring show) and not to mention that even among these people I would think some have some pretty "bad quality" sexual happenings that don't really leave them fulfilled. This being said, I would put my money on the idea that the average single girl can probably have more sex then the average single guy (unless I'm wrong here). I kind of buy the idea that a minority of more or less single guys get a lot of more or less single girls. But I've read saying this is "sexist" ... But I think it makes sense. Some guys break that barrier of fear - get good at it (or they were "naturals") - and then they can "get girls". And since girls, even if feminism has progressed, still like the guy to take the initiative - it creates that effect. Many shy guys don't get anything and are stuck. Another similar study I have seen (but I don't remember the source) was saying how young (20s-30s) people today have less sex then this same age category 20 or 30 years ago. And one of the reasons was that people where actually more often in committed relationships in those days (hence more sex). Apart from this, what struck me when I read that article was how you would think people have so much more sex today (society being so "liberated" and "pro sexuality") - but my own personal perspective is that people are usually more socially anxious then 20 or 30 years ago and have more trouble interacting and are more isolated. On the other hand society is more "sexualized" - the idea of sex is present all around (ads, how people dress) but the actual thing is much rarer to find (especially good quality sex). It's kind of like a tease. I once read someone describe this as living in a society with a "diffused sexuality" (rather then a healthy natural one). But hopefully one can take in these facts and see how he can deal with this situations. I would also bet there is still good connection possible (physical or not physical) even nowadays, and that's what I would like to get better at building or finding. What I mean by the quote you picked here was that I sometimes have some envy (that maybe is misplaced) for the fact that single girls can have fun (but maybe I'm wrong). And I have jealousy of the guys who get those girls. But with a correction in my mindset, maybe I can let go some of that resentment which isn't helping my cause in any way - and in the end, be more comfortable with who I am and my own position right now. When I was thinking that I should try to see girls as more then just a chance for me to get some much desired and needed physical intimacy, to see them as potential friends (even if I don't get sex) and try to find girls that I genuinely connect with I felt like some of that resentment was melting away. Which made me feel like that would be a good mindset for me to adopt.