The part in bold seems about right for me at the moment. Did you have a job all this time? I'm a week away from my last relapse, but been fighting this for a few years now. I'm 31 and have a failing freelance 'career' so I'm basically unemployed now and the anxiety of rapidly running out of money (coupled with the fact that I probably don't have a good enough portfolio to get a job anytime soon) is killing me. I feel like I've been doing nothing with my life for the past 10 years and have had no motivation or goals (depression/apathy). I don't feel like I'm equipped to deal with things like taking care of finances, working with others, organising myself, etc. The realities of life basically. If I had a job, this would be so much easier, but it seems like an impossibility at the moment. I've got so many aspects of my character that I need to improve on, and I'm running out of time. Do you think it is ok for someone in our situation to take a crappy job at a supermarket or wherever to give us time to get our heads straight? It looks bad on a CV and my pride (the little I have left) would take a hit, but it would help to pay bills and get me back into the world interacting more with people. Financial insecurity and unemployment play a massive role in my relapses and, along with the addiction, it's the major cause of my anxiety/depression. It's not talked about enough on these forums.