He who conquers self.....

Discussion in 'Ages 20-24' started by randomness, May 2, 2012.

  1. randomness

    randomness New Member

    Managed 7 days, new record, but relapsed on the 7'th day.

    Rather interesting, was how I relapsed.
    I was all ready to torrent some movies and edge for a good hour or two, but then I simply decided to stop fooling myself, turned the PC off, then masturbate normally, simply by the power of thought. Didn't feel ANY shame afterward, no regrets, simply vented some steam I guess.

    Also had a rather disturbing dream the other night: I dreamt I was watching myself watch porn , (in a sort of third person), and I was watching some really disturbing stuff, stuff that I thought would be impossible to get excited about. Could this be my brain finally starting to go back to normal?

    Also totally failed a test at collage. What's interesting here is , again, me not having any regrets about it. I didn't study so I failed. I didn't fail because I'm stupid, or that It's impossible for me to study, it's simply because I chose not to, realizing beforehand that I was probably going to fail it. So I'm taking responsibility for my actions, good or bad as they are.

    Progress all around, even though these last 2 days could be considered failures .

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