Hang in Long Enough

Discussion in 'Ages 20-24' started by ButSeriously, Apr 1, 2012.

  1. ButSeriously

    ButSeriously New Member

    I am currently a 21 year old male and have been looking at explicit images and videos for nearly a decade. I found this site from Your Brain on Porn as I have been trying to quit for most of those years but never have fully. My hope is that this journal will help me finally succeed.

    I started looking at sexual images on the internet around age 11. I started out looking at girls in thongs and other soft images and gradually escalated to hardcore videos over the next few years. I still remember first being curious and getting a dopamine rush, which I was very surprised by for soft images. I continued on and eventually started masturbating to it. I didn't realize how much of a rush I'd get or how addicting it would be, and while I've tried endlessly to quit I've never had full success at it. I've gone 150 days without porn with 45 days without masturbation within that time, but that's the best I've done.

    I hate how sexualized our culture is, and how so many people (guys in particular) use porn but no one ever talks about it. It leads to a culture of lust and marginalization of women as objects, and few seem to realize the role of pornography behind it. I want to quit to help myself respect women and be able to develop a healthy relationship in the future (currently single) but also be able to help others once I am able to reboot myself.

    I call this thread Hang in Long Enough since that is what I must do through the trials and tribulations of quitting. I've experienced the same things many others here have of depression, being horny, etc. during a reboot but I'll just have to stay tough and keep posting here. It's also the first song in the album ...But Seriously by Phil Collins, which I have named my username after.
     
  2. ButSeriously

    ButSeriously New Member

    Today is Day 3 for me and the first day I've had a lot of temptation. I think starting this journal has helped me mentally quite a lot, but I'll just have to keep hanging in and see how it goes.
     
  3. bosseau

    bosseau Guest

    150 days eithout porn and 45 without mastutbation is a huge achievement- if you can do it once you can definitely better that in future! Just keep with it and it will all work out.
     
  4. ButSeriously

    ButSeriously New Member

    Yesterday marked one week and I had some temptations but held through fine. They've lingered somewhat but I can tell from comparing this to earlier attempts to stop PMO that this journal is helping me mentally with motivation and purpose, which I had mostly lacked before.
     
  5. ButSeriously

    ButSeriously New Member

    Today was Day 9 and there was a lot of temptation this morning but I was able to hold through. I know that this point in the reboot will be tough, so I'll have to remember that.
     
  6. wayne_992

    wayne_992 New Member

    Keep going, day9 is one hell of a milestone, just remember DO NOT LET YOUR GUARD DOWN. it cancreep up on you when you least expect it.

    http://www.yourbrainrebalanced.com/index.php?topic=345.0
     
  7. tymbles

    tymbles Guest

    Was clicking through these journals and also clicking through youtube, just happened to be listening to Son of Man by Phil Collins, with an album art picture I'd never seen before, then clicked from that onto a tab I'd previously opened of your journal. Thought my browser had glitched when it was your avatar. Mad coincidence. 150 days no porn is amazing. 77 days is my personal record. Best of luck, just hang in long enough!
     
  8. ButSeriously

    ButSeriously New Member

    Today is Day 15 and I had my first nocturnal emission of the reboot this morning, right before I woke up. The timing is around what I had expected, and things have gone relatively well so far. Just some temptations now and then, but nothing too serious and no relapses.
     
  9. fullset

    fullset Member

    150 days was a huge achievement. Do you remember what made you fall of the wagon? Just so I know what to lookout for.
     
  10. Ballboy11

    Ballboy11 New Member

    I worry somethings even worse with me. I haven't had a NE during my first 30 days of no PMO, and i am now currently on day 13 of my 90 day reboot attempt. If yu have them at day 15, whats the deal with me rarely having them? Am I screwed up that bad? I get great morning erections at the moment on day 13. :(
     
  11. ssk08

    ssk08 Pointman

    I still get semi-erections in the morning (probably from me unconsciously touching it), sometimes dream about intimate stuff, no nocturnal emission, but I can feel that some is released when I pee. (Because I've been rebooting for 4.5 months)
     
  12. Ballboy11

    Ballboy11 New Member

    I hear ya, ssk08, but if i'm getting rock hard in the mornings, what the deal with no NE's, and semen/pre cum weepage when turned on? :-[
     
  13. ssk08

    ssk08 Pointman

    Do you cum, when turned on? If so, maybe you have a weak pubic muscle? Or what's the problem really? Everyone here is different.
     
  14. Ballboy11

    Ballboy11 New Member

    ssk08, Yeah I cum everytime I masturbate or have intercourse with females. I mean like today, day 13, I woke to a very nice 90% erection, looked at some naked friend pics on my phone fantasized a little while hard, and found pre cum leakage..I have yet to have a wet dream ever since I was 12 or so. Just weird that pre cum comes so easily yet wet dreams seem non exhistent. :-\
     
  15. fullset

    fullset Member

    I've only had 2 wet dreams in my life. I read somewhere: one guy asked a urologist about healthy M frequency and the doc said interval between 2 wet dreams. I don't think the doc mentioned, or I don't remember reading, but the doc implied interval between two wet dreams with no pmo. I think wet dreams are natures response for clean plumbing. May be the reason for not having wet dreams is you've never given an opportunity to your body for a natural flush. Or may be you have a greater holding capacity?
     
  16. ButSeriously

    ButSeriously New Member

    That was about two and a half years ago. I only quit P and did MO every other week or so. That was my first semester at college, but when I was back for Christmas break it got a lot tougher, and that took me by surprise. So my record is 150 days no P and 45 days (which were within that 150) of no PMO.
     
  17. Overload

    Overload New Member

    Great to see a Phil fan, definitely a fan my self. Your doing great and it looks like you did very well in the past too. Lets get out of this for the last time! Stay strong!!
     
  18. Hopefully

    Hopefully Guest

    That's what I think. Having too much time wasting shurely is a trigger. And having things to do (like college, what is very exciting) can kill the triggers. If there is something that gives your life a real sense you won't have to to get in any ill behavior.

    But this is not easy to find....stay strong and walk on!
     
  19. ButSeriously

    ButSeriously New Member

    Today is day 30 and I had another nocturnal emission this morning. I'll have to stay alert since I know the couple days after can be especially challenging. I've had some temptations now and then over the past few days as well, but I held on. I'm 2/3 of the way to my no-PMO record, so I definitely want to beat that and get up to 120, which should be a reboot by then and make it a lot easier going forward.
     
  20. Rebornzt

    Rebornzt New Member

    I've noticed that starting a journal can be a serious trigger to a real engagement in the path. I talk for myself since I felt the difference the day I discovered YBOP and from starting a journal. I had a relapse, but usually relapses ended up in binging for porn well nowaday, for the first time, it didn't. Keep up the good work and you are on the right path and know it. Just the mere idea of thinking you are not the only one fighting through that hellish path makes you stronger!
    Hang on !
     

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